ordinary mother

I moved to wordpress

2008-07-01T16:57:00.000-07:00

You can find ordinary mother right here.

Happy Birthday My Little Sparkler

2007-07-05T05:30:00.000-07:00

Maggie turned 6 today!! Here is her Chibi fairy cake. The original artwork was done by my talented 15 year old neice, Sierra.

Moving With Danielle

2006-07-31T15:34:00.000-07:00

I am moving with Danielle. Well, not exactly. I'm moving to Word Press with Danielle. You can find me at ordinarymother.wordpress.com. Or, just click here. By the way, if you are using bloglines, you will need to add the wordpress account. Can't wait to show you my new place!

lost links

2006-07-29T16:12:00.000-07:00

I messed with my template and that is why my bloggin' buddy links are missing. I will have them up soon, Lord willing.

My Crazy Little Bro

2006-07-28T05:20:00.000-07:00

My brother has a warped sense of humor. He sent me this self portrait last week. Isn't he cute?! Like father, like son!

Linen Storage

2006-07-27T08:23:00.000-07:00

I finally tamed the beast...my linen closet. And I will admit to the fact that several times yesterday I opened my organized linen and just stood there admiring it. Sweet order...even if only for a little while. While I was working I remembered one of my favorite organization tips found in one of the many home management books I read during a strange obsession.This obsession was more with the books than the actual organizing, but still, there were a few things I did adapt that have made my life easier. One of them is how to keep your bed linens organized. Fold your fitted sheet, top sheet, and other pillow case (if there are two) , stack them, and put them inside the other pillow case. It's like a little pouch. When you go to make a bed you just pull out the linen pouch and voila! it's all there. It doesn't look perfect, but it sure beats trying to track down the matching miscellaneous linens, and it definitely looks better than my version of folded fitted sheet. Here's what it looks like in real life.

My First & Best

2006-07-26T07:10:00.000-07:00

I said I would share a few thoughts from the retreat I attended a couple of weeks ago, but my good intentions were swallowed up by all-things-ankle-surgery. In fact, where last month I had serious blogger’s block, it seems this month I have tons of things I want to write about or pass along. Today’s pearl of wisdom comes from the teaching Dave Harvey gave entitled What Does Women’s Ministry Mean For Me? Though it was directed to pastor’s wives, the first point has universal application to Christian wives and mothers. That point was stated like this: “The primary role of the pastor’s wife is to serve and support her husband and family.” Dave continued to say “Husbands and kids are the first & most important responsibility. Therefore they deserve your first & best effort.” This means the first and best of my time, talent, creativity, and energy should be spent on my husband and children. This means that every other good pursuit (exercise, blogging, entertainment and leisure, even other aspects of ministry)* will have to get second best or lower. Perhaps the most helpful insight was when Dave pointed out that the fatal flaw of feminism is that it assumes women have multiple best efforts. This simply isn’t true. We can buy into the Christian version of this lie and think that we can “have it all”. We can host play groups, make meals for others, go to the gym, decorate the house exquisitely, have a little home industry, etc.* But the truth is, if any of the good things in that list begin to infringe on my first & best effort, I am not effectively doing what is my primary calling: to serve my husband and children. I love how Dave finished this section of the teaching. He said, “Your first and best effort in the home releases him [my husband] into the field in an undistracted way.” My commitment to giving Jason and kids my first & best directly impacts Jason's work, which happens to be ministry. I truly want the best for my husband. At the same time I feel this constant pull to invest my creativity in such a way that others see it and say, “wow, she is really creative!” I want to exert energy on the things I enjoy: writing, cake decorating, hospitality, reading, etc.* In fact, many of these things begin as an attempt to give Jason and the kids my first and best, but they morph into complex and extravagant entities in and of themselves…before I know it, I forgot to feed the kids lunch because I was too busy making a fancy birthday cake for them; or I gave Jason only half of my attention in a conversation because I was really wanting to read this article on being a godly wife. How can I who am constantly bent towards self-orientation – to the point of turning things that seem others oriented into something about me – really give my husband and my family my first and my best? I can only think of one way…because another gave His first and best. The Father gave the Son, a perfect sacrifice, to atone for my sins, and clothe me with Jesus’ righteousness. Because of Jesus’ death my sin which pulls me in to myself, is forgiven. Because Jesus rose from the dead, I can have victory by His grace and strength to serve out of genuine love for others, beginning with my husband and children. *I want to be sure that my readers know that these are my issues. They might not be yours. I would hate for anyone to feel unnecessary guilt if they are pursuing these things. In truth, your husband is the one who could best tell you if certain activities aren't serving him and the family. I only give specifics to help make the abstract more concrete.

You know you have brothers when...

2006-07-25T07:13:00.000-07:00

...your mother asks you to get her a screw driver and you say, "flat head?" ...you bring your mother a live frog and say, "isn't he cute?" (yeah, no problem kissing frogs for my little princess). ...you come upstairs and calmly tell mommy, "I think I have a bug behind my ear." then proceed to remove a tick and hand it to her. (I have heart palpitations just typing this. I'm okay with all bugs and spiders except for ticks. Ugh!!! and yes, I called the pediatrician about the possibility of lyme's disease and she said because it didn't embed itself -ew!- she should be fine...but I'm still checking her body nightly for a red bull's eye mark). That's my girlie!

One Day When I Get My Act Together...

2006-07-24T08:17:00.000-07:00

I find myself living in the, “someday, when I get my act together I’ll…” mode often. It consists of this little fantasy world with visions of me doing all kinds of stuff that the real me just can’t seem to do. I find it frustrating to not know what the magical catapult to hurl me from here to there is. I was sharing this frustration with my husband who gave me some very wise counsel that I want to pass on. He said something like, “we often want the big grand moment when permanent change will take place and we will have our acts together, but our pride could never handle that. So God gives victory in the little things instead, but we are too often looking for some huge change and don’t notice the grace in ‘little’ victories.” He went on to tell me about something he saw on Antiques Roadshow (we love this show, me for the antiques; Jason for the history as well as the rush from seeing someone’s yard sale bargain turn into a retirement fund). A woman’s mother died leaving her a travel trailer and its contents. The contents included a small, simple painting of a sailboat race. When the appraiser informed the woman that its value was over $100,000 the woman just started crying and said, “if only my poor mother knew what she had…” It wasn’t a Rembrandt or a Van Gogh. Indeed, we don’t even know the author’s name, and certainly had never seen this piece of art before. But it had far more value than the owner realized. This is what our lives are like. There will rarely be “Van Gogh art” moments when we finally have our acts together. If we go through the day looking for Van Gogh, and don’t see the simple work of art hanging in the trailer, we are poorer for it. Father, please help me to see the amazing grace at work in my life and in the lives of those around me each and every day. This grace comes because of the Gospel. Help me not to be ungrateful for the small steps in the right direction, or arrogantly assume they are just me doing what is expected, rather than the Holy Spirit at work in and through me, again, because of the Gospel. Help me to have eyes to see Your artwork in the everyday events of my life, to the praise and glory of Your grace given through the Gospel.

Guarded With Gratitude

2006-07-21T08:19:00.000-07:00

Imagine for a moment that your city were surrounded by enemy forces who aimed to destroy you. And you are aware that enemy sympathizers live and work in the city with a view to undermining the city's defenses. And suppose you discover that there is song which the enemy and their sympathizers cannot tolerate or approach. Whenever they hear it, they pull back and run the other direction. Isn't it certain that you would want to learn this song? And after you learned it you would sing it when you went to bed at night and when you got up in the morning. You would sing it on the way to work, and whenever you were among strangers. And as your confidence grew you would even venture outside the city and sing it as you walked boldly through the enemy lines on your way to another town. The more deeply imbedded in your mind the song became, the more steady and deep and serene and fearless your life would become. Others would see and hear and learn the song from you. And in the end you would conquer the enemy, and there would be no threat at all. Well, we are surrounded by the enemy—namely, Satan and his forces. He is "the father of lies" (John 8:44). His weapons are deceit and delusion. His aim is the destruction of your faith and love. And there are enemy sympathizers inside the city of our own souls—namely, the desires of the old self. And there is a song that Satan and his sympathizers cannot tolerate or approach—namely, the song of thanks to God. –John Piper from Guard Yourself With Gratitude

I find the battle raging today. The old self with its tendencies toward grumbling and complaining, self-pity and selfishness conspires with the Enemy who tells me my help comes from a change in circumstances, or escape from my duty here. I am grateful for the reminder that gratitude is a guard for my soul today. Beyond the immediate very tangible and abundant mercies around me, I am grateful for the source from which they come: my Savior, Jesus Christ. He lived a perfect life, never grumbling or complaining; never indulging himself rather than doing his Father’s will; always giving pity to others not Himself. He died my death. He took upon Himself the punishment my grumbling, complaining, disobedience, and self-pity deserves. I now stand forgiven, justified, and adopted. I who am weary today come to Him who is gentle and humble in heart. Gentle, humble in heart, and yet ruling and reigning in power and wisdom and authority…seated at the right hand of the Father. Worthy of all glory and honor and praise is He. How grateful my heart is for the beautiful Savior. Ah, sweet peace!

Really Yummy Banana Bread

2006-07-20T08:04:00.000-07:00

I have been on a quest to find a really good banana bread recipe. I used to have one that called for cooking oil as opposed to butter that was moist and delicious, but I lost it somehow. Well, yesterday I found a similar recipe online. It's too good not to pass along. Really Moist Banana Bread 3 c. sugar 3 eggs 1/2 tsp. vanilla 3 c. bananas, or more (I use 5-6 bananas) 2 tsp. soda 1 1/2 tsp. salt 3 1/2 c. flour 1/3 c. water 1 c. oil 1 tsp. cinnamon 1 c. nuts (we do chocolate chips instead of nuts) I mixed the wet ingredients first, combined the flour, soda, salt separately. Added dry to wet. Stirred in chocolate chips last. Makes 2 large loaves of bread. Put in 2 greased and floured loaf pans and bake at 350 degrees for 45 minutes to 1 hour.

Who's Helping Whom?

2006-07-19T06:10:00.000-07:00

I wrote this yesterday... I am sitting in the waiting room of an outpatient surgery center. Jason just left donning his gown, robe, slippers, and fancy hat…no, he would not let me post the picture I took with my camera phone. It occurs to me as I type that in the kindness of God, I am going to have opportunity to grow in the very area I experienced conviction over during one part of Girlie Time last week. Let me give a little bit of background first. I attend a church that teaches, encourages, and affirms biblical womanhood. I can articulate our beliefs about this. I am excited about these beliefs. I aspire to conform more and more to what I believe. This is a work of the grace of God. Given my selfish pride, the fact that I find femininity as biblically defined appealing, beautiful, and desirable is absolute proof that miracles do happen. However, I have noticed that there are inconsistencies between my profession of belief, and how it functions in my life. I know that this will be the case for as long as I live here dragging around a body of flesh, but still – in this particular area it seems easy to look at certain externals and think that I am living this whole complementarian thing, when really in the day to day there are ways I operate as an "equal in function" type wife. One inconsistency I am aware of is a recurring pattern that is perhaps the byproduct of distorting Jason’s call to “servant leadership” in the home. You see, Jason excels in serving, and I excel in being served. What’s the problem?! I remember when it first dawned on me that there was a “problem”. I was in the kitchen at that dreaded hour when the children go bonkers, I make dinner, and Jason runs late at the office, and I caught myself thinking (or perhaps the Holy Spirit helped me to hear my own thinking), “I can’t wait until Jason gets home to help me.” Now even more revealing than the fact that I wasn’t just happy to have him home because I am madly in love with him was the fact that I was functionally viewing him as my helper. The follow up thought was, “well, if my kids weren’t so close in age, and I wasn’t tired and pregnant , I wouldn’t be so dependent on his help…” (These thoughts look rather benign typed neatly in black and white, but were the emotions able to be translated in writing, they would be bold face, red, and all caps.) It is fitting and appropriate for Jason to serve when he comes home. The problem was that I was demanding this and taking advantage of his desire to be a servant leader. God in His mercy continued to bring conviction and clarity. At a marriage conference we sat under a teaching that included the phrase “masculine helpmate”. Ouch. This is what was happening. I am ashamed to say that there were many days in the early years of our parenting when I would call my husband, give him an earful about how hard my life was, manipulate a break from my circumstances, and functionally view him as my helper when he was at home. The difference between my fist twinge of conscience, and this revelation during the teaching was that Jason also heard the latter. What he always thought was simply growing in servanthood, was actually not serving me at all. It was, in fact, confirming the lie I was already believing that grace to serve my husband and family turned off at 5:30 pm. Because of Jason’s courageous leadership (and I use the word courageous for a reason), I have seen change taking place. The phenomenon of counting down the minutes before my helper arrives is not as common. Still, Jason and I find ourselves in this cycle from time to time when he seems to be serving me to the point of indulgence, and I am taking advantage of his willingness to serve me. In this season it is manifested in the realm of him taking on domestic responsibility to fill in the gaps where I'm lacking. So here, in the waiting room, I anticipate what is sure to assist my fresh resolve to give Jason my first and best effort. He takes such good care of me, I am happy to be able to serve him rather extensively for a while, and re-align my heart to be his helper, not the other way around.

Thank you for praying

2006-07-18T16:13:00.000-07:00

Everything went well today. We are grateful to God for His kindness to us. We survived the surgery...and the drive home! We thought it funny (?) that the nurse labeled his ankles "yes" and "no" prior to the surgery. Thank you for your prayers on our behalf.

Please Pray For Jason (and me)

2006-07-18T07:04:00.000-07:00

Basketball and Jason have a rather toxic relationship. Just three years ago, after tearing his ACL and PCL while playing basketball, Jason had knee surgery. Today, he is having ankle surgery to remove a bone chip, re-attach and tighten ligaments, and something else I can't remember. How did he injure his ankle? Basketball, of course. I have to say that I respect my husband's commitment to this sport that has treated him so poorly. Donned in braces and wraps he plays at 6am every Tuesday and Thursday. He loves this sport! I am praying that Jason's surgery would be successful, and the recovery as short as possible. We are both praying that God would be glorified in both of our lives through the process, Jason through the difficulty of not being able to get around easily and all that this involves; and I through the opportunity to serve my husband in a more pronounced way especially over the three or four days he will be completely out of commission. If you have a moment, will you join us in our prayers?

Retreat

2006-07-17T07:22:00.000-07:00

Last week I spent three days in a hotel enjoying a retreat with other pastor’s wives from the region of Sovereign Grace churches Dave Harvey oversees. The kindness of God, expressed in the kindness of the ladies of CFC opening their annual pastor’s wives retreat, was evident in many ways. Slippers. Yes, slippers were one of the creative ways Kimm Harvey sought to bless us and make us feel like this is just one big slumber party. We didn’t call this a conference, or a retreat. We called it “girlie time”…and from the pretty name cards, Victorian centerpieces, gift bag (including chocolate, breath gum, and the sound track from Pride and Prejudice), laughter and tears…girlie time was the perfect name. Kimm Harvey is truly one of the most personable individuals I have ever met. She set the tone, and sustained it with her sincere desire to bless us, as well as her love for a good time. Many thanks to this lady who worked so hard and served us so well! Seriously out of place men. Aron Osborn and Dave Harvey provided the outstanding teaching we received bringing sharper focus to our role as women biblically defined, and more specifically with application to how this looks for pastor’s wives. Small groups. One huge blessing from the retreat was the small group I was blessed to be a part of. Each lady shared insightfully, articulately, and humbly. Wow! Talk about your dream discussion group…anyway, I am so happy to have had the privilege to get to know ladies that I have previously only seen from a distance. Scheduled personal retreat hours. Yep. Two block times were carved out of our schedule just for me, God, and a few good books. I am so grateful for this opportunity. Armed with Carolyn Mahaney's personal retreat outline, much coffee, and a God-given understanding of my desperate need for this time, I received much encouragement, refreshment, and direction for my day to day life. Sharing. Because I wish you could have all been there with me, I am going to hopefully do the next best thing and share some highlights over the next few days. This is to help me as much as you. It is amazing how already, less than one week later, it is already a bit foggy. I look forward to sharing with you what God showed me during those cherished days. Whether it is insights from ladies in my growth group, parts of the teaching that I found helpful, or my personal responses to both of those things, I hope to pass along at least a little bit of the grace imparted to me through this retreat.

In defense of Mari...lou

2006-07-10T05:46:00.000-07:00

Okay, if you haven't been yet, you'll need to read "gentle sobbing" in order to understand this explanatory post. Here are a few facts to consider now that you've heard the story...true story, mind you. First, we laugh about this story with Marilou pretty much at some point during every staff wives growth group. She is a good sport, but thinks we're all crazy, which leads me to my next point. Second, the passengers involved in this story, aside from shotgun riding daughter, are freaks in the car. We are all very nervous drivers, and even more nervous passengers. What Karen so innocently described as "bringing a magazine with her to share for our amusement" is really her coping mechanism when riding in anyone's car. Karen has been known to read grocery receipts in the car to distract herself from even the best of car rides. And I, I mean, Laurin...have posted about my own nervous tendencies to slam an invisible break or gasp out loud spontaneously when riding in cars with other drivers. So keep this in mind as you read Karen's view of the whole thing. Third, we all had a wonderful bonding moment that night...that's what happens when you have a near death experience!

Karen Complied

2006-07-08T05:41:00.000-07:00

Yahoo! Karen wrote the story about our near death experience on the way to Gaithersburg last year. You can read it right here. Thanks, funny girl. I truly am grateful for a friend who provides "good medicine" to my soul on a regular basis. You will be sorely missed at the retreat this week...and by the way, guess who ISN'T driving us there?!

Random and Requests

2006-07-07T14:51:00.000-07:00

Two of my favorite things are converging: Girl Talk and reading. Looky here! Maybe this is pushy, but I have a few requests for my bloggin' buddies to write about the following things: 1. Karen Hevesy (who last night described a mullet as "business in the front, party in the back") please blog about our near death experience on the way to the CLC Titus 2 Tuesdays last year. Everyone, leave comments in Karen's blog begging her... 2. Danielle, please write that post about fashion. For those of you who don't know her, Danielle has fantastic taste in all things, including clothing...feminine, stylish, and modest. 3. Any of you homeschooling moms...could you blog about your educational philosophy, curriculum choices, what you've found helpful. I would love to hear all about it!

Celebrate Good Times!

2006-07-06T04:43:00.000-07:00

beginning the day with a little love for Caleb. Sweet Birthday Girl (This cake came together with the combined creativity and brain power of my sister-inlaw, Ab; her mother, my friend Tracey; and me.) cool corn picture My friend Briana introduced us to our new corn on the cob obsession. You peel back the husk, but keep it attached (wrap it with a rubber band). Then, roast the corn on your grill using the husk-handles to turn it (handles are not on the flame), then brush the hot corn with mayonnaise, and then roll it in a mixture of Parmesan cheese, chili powder, and garlic salt. Voila! Amazing corn that looks cool. blowing out the candles. Look how cute Charli looks in the background! Cute cousins! left to right: Daniel, Caleb, Josh, Sierra holding Charli, Maggs, Izzy holding Jack. Maggie on her first big-girl bike My five year old beauty! Thanks to Tracey for taking many of these pictures (any of the cute ones were taken by her...I took that first blurry one :). Coming soon: Party #2 - the Reyes clan. We had to celebrate separately this year because Abuelo and Abuela are in England.

She's My Maggie Doodle Dandy

2006-07-04T19:17:00.000-07:00

Five years ago today, we woke up on the Fourth of July with sick boys. Coughs, runny noses, and fevers meant we wouldn’t be going to the annual church picnic at Brian and Tracie Young’s house. Frankly, being uncomfortably pregnant, I was not really in the mood to do heat, humidity, and…a bathing-suit! And just as an aside, how in the world do you preggies do the whole stay skinny except for the belly thing? I fight bitterness when I see how cute Tara and Jessica look. I get pregnant from my nose to my ankles, eat like a linebacker, and deal with the weight loss later. Anyway, back to my story. Even though my due date was July 9th, and my midwife said my cervix hadn’t changed at all, I was determined to do all that was in my power (which, we all know is absolutely nothing) to have another holiday baby. (Izzy was born on Thanksgiving Day – his birth story is the best complete with Jason getting stitches over in the e.r. while I labored in the maternity ward). We decided to take the boys to the mall so that I could walk…and walk…and walk. Nothing happened. We did all of the other things you read about to get labor going. I’ll spare you the details, but I’ll just say mineral oil is best taken with a chaser of orange juice. We even drove on Singer Rd. (which we now call Maggie Singer Rd.) because I always had contractions going over the hills. I did start having contractions, but nothing in a pattern. Time passed and as the evening hours commenced I gave up on a fourth of July baby because I reasoned that even if I went into labor now, I would never have the baby by midnight…I do the whole get an epidural, slow down your labor thing. Then around 7pm I was on the phone with my sister when I had a rather strong contraction. This was random. My other labors were text book beginning with mild contractions for a while, then increasing in intensity and closer together in time. I had other little and big contractions but they were spaced erratically like two minutes apart, twelve minutes apart, etc. so I didn’t think I was in labor. By the time my inlaws came to visit I was contracting really well, and I have fond memories of Emily and Debbie timing contractions while I paced the living room. I told Jason they were five minutes apart and hurt pretty badly so it was time. The car ride to the hospital was crazy. I was having really bad contractions. I called everyone to meet us at labor and delivery because I thought I might be further along than usual upon arriving. We arrived at 9pm at 7 cm. Margaret Olivia Reyes was born at 11:10 pm, 8 lbs. 15oz to parents who had no idea she would be a girl! That was the best surprise of my life. I am so glad we waited to know what we were having (which was really hard for me, especially at the sonogram). I found out with my first three, but for this one – my last (?) – I decided to be surprised. I was overwhelmed at the kindness of God for a great labor and delivery, and a healthy baby girl. I still think it says something of God’s care for the little details that she was born on the fourth of July, less than an hour before midnight. Maggie is the girl of my dreams. She is sparkly, sweet, and feisty (a lot like her aunt Karyn). She is tender hearted, and loves to sing songs about Jesus (that she makes up herself). Panera Bread is her favorite restaurant. What five year old do you know who orders an asiago cheese bagel with sundried tomato cream cheese? She has coffee parties, not tea parties (pretend of course, but if I let her, she’d be a coffee junkie like her mama). Her favorite color is pink. She loves Target, like her mother., and shares my affinity for fun shoes and purses. Maggie is my little helper. She enjoys helping me cook, and sets a beautiful table for tea/coffee parties. She loves getting flowers from daddy and brothers (totally upstages mommy on the ooing and ahhing). All of this, and she can wield a light saber, tackle her brothers, and loves mini-coopers, p.t. cruisers, punch buggies, and jeeps. That’s my girl! Happy Birthday to the princess of the family! Happy Birthday to my little sparkler! Happy Birthday to my Maggie Doodle Dandy! (Party Pics coming soon!!!)

Foolish Girl: Confessions of the Mediocre Poster Child

2006-07-03T17:10:00.000-07:00

I am not a good legalist, but that doesn’t seem to keep me from trying. Let me explain myself. I am not one of those capable types of gals who got straight A’s in highschool, jogs 5 miles a day, keeps a house that is consistently in order, bakes her own bread, trains her children to read at age 3, and makes her husband’s lunches everyday, complete with heart shaped sandwich and note of encouragement. I know girls like these. They are amazing. I’m not accusing them of legalism, but if they had the inclination to be legalists, it would be understandable – they are good performers; they are achievers. I, on the other hand, consider myself the poster child of mediocrity, and that could be an overestimation. I made average grades, hate jogging, can’t open my linen closet without an over crowded towel or two tumbling off the shelf. My daughter can’t read, but knows her letters and sounds because of a leap frog dvd, the closest thing to homemade bread I make comes in a can, and my husband drinks a slimfast shake for lunch these days sans any little notes of encouragement from his wife. It would seem to me that my mediocrity would set me up nicely to know that I will only be able to do this life in a manner worthy of the gospel by the grace of God at work in me. Even more convincing should be the astounding number of failures I experience each and every day. But still, when I consider the standards of God’s Word with regard to glorifying Him as a woman, rather than consistently cast myself upon the grace and mercy of my Savior and pray for the help of the Holy Spirit, my reaction is often to reduce the standard to something even I, the mediocre poster child, can maintain. I get frustrated by the biblical principle, so I set my eyes on some practice that I can do without the Helper. This is foolishness. I was reminded of this again when I read an article by Paul Tripp.

“The fool doesn’t need grace because he keeps telling himself that he is able. In order to convince himself that he’s able, he erects a human second-best standard that he can meet. That’s what legalism does. Legalism, in rejecting grace, erects a human second-best standard that I can keep.” Paul Tripp Wisdom in Counseling from the Journal of Biblical Counseling Volume 18, No.2; Winter 2001

If this is foolishness, what is wisdom? Again, Dr. Tripp is helpful.

“The wise man is not afraid of his inability, because he knows that Christ’s grace is sufficient. However, the wise man is afraid of the delusions of human strength, because those delusions will keep him from seeking the grace of Christ. The wise man can glory in weakness because he knows of the sufficiency of Christ. The wise man is approachable, able to be corrected. The wise man is humble, waking up every morning saying, “I am a person ingreat need. Thank you Lord, that you are in my life. There’s hope for me.” (from the same article)

When my capacity collides with my calling as a wife and mother in particular, my reactions can range from self-pity (poor me, I’ll never get this thing right!), anger (why am I not changing!), legalism (hey, I may not be loving my children with a tender affection right now, but I did take them to the pool today) or humility (God, I need You). In other words, I can be a legalistic fool, pursing a pitiful standard that I can keep, or I can be a wise woman casting myself always on the mercy and grace of God. So the next time I try to run with the achievers and end up either crashing and burning, or seriously simplifying the course, may I see my foolishness and run to the throne of grace, boasting in my weakness the entire way.

Schedule Summary

2006-06-29T06:50:00.000-07:00

I’m wrapping up my scheduling posts today because, well, because I’m tired of writing them, and you’re probably tired of reading them. Here are my concluding thoughts: 1. The schedule has helped make sure certain things happen in the Reyes home that wouldn’t otherwise (okay, I’ll admit, brushing teeth was part of our schedule). 2. The schedule was interrupted, changed, and adjusted every single day. This is fine – no nervous twitches from me. 3. Although there has been more order in my home (primarily due to the fact that I am back on schedule) scheduling wasn’t a magic pill that solved all of my children’s discipline issues…or mine. 4. Having said number three, I am amazed at how much boredom plays a role in the arguing that takes place in our home, and the schedule has helped us here. I’m not on the smooth path to scheduling by any means. I want to say that this is a new habit for our family, but it is too early to make that conclusion. Maybe in a month I’ll update to say if I’m really still doing this or not. Thanks for the additional accountability. It was easier to stay on course knowing that I’d be blogging about it at some point! And thank you to anyone who prayed for me, the grace was evident and amazing. Not being one of those orderly, scheduly folks, I can easily attribute any ability to have a schedule to the grace of God alone.

Worship God Conference Anyone?

2006-06-28T14:20:00.000-07:00

I was just wondering if any of the gals who read this are going to be at the Worship God conference. Wouldn't it be great to get together?

Honeymoon Over?

2006-06-27T16:43:00.000-07:00

Well, let's just say that the kids weren't exactly thanking God for the schedule yesterday. In fact, several times I was met with complaining as I sought to keep us on track. The rain hasn't helped matters either. In the afternoons they are confined to the house as opposed to pool time or outside time. Though I'm often amazed at how long my kids can keep themselves entertained, this chunk of time just begs to tempt them to boredom (meaning bickering soon to follow). I asked my friend Kathy for any suggestions as to how to fill the time. She reminded me of my own centerpiece idea, doing a craft, writing notes or cards to great grandma who just arrived last week, etc. These are great ideas that I will try to implement. Today we went to my mom's to visit, then came home and made centerpieces for the dinner table out of clay (including a cake, bounty hunter, soccer goalie picture, and lego house with fan on the back). I guess it would have been unrealistic to expect my children to perfectly submit to the discipline of a schedule day after day, but even with the resistence I met today, I will say that they responded quickly to my explanation for why we were doing what we were doing. If you are beginning to schedule, or getting back on a schedule like I am - be encouraged that I still say the benefit is outweighing the challenge. Does anybody have ideas for easy crafts to do with my children? Pleeeeeeeaaaaaase leave them in my comment box, I beg you!

We Interrupt This Schedule...

2006-06-27T07:20:00.000-07:00

Saturday, a group of men from the church came over to help build our deck. I am overwhelmed at the sacrificial servanthood these men and their wives who released them, displayed. The double blessing was that my boys were able to see biblical manhood in action, not just through daddy, but through a group of other men with skills daddy doesn’t have. How kind of God to provide the church to give more examples of what it means to be a humble servant leader. These guys were amazing with my boys. They let them participate and patiently taught them how to hammer, use cool tools, etc. This was not on our schedule, but it was on God’s schedule, and I am grateful for His provision of role models through a group of hard working, humble men. Thanks to any of the wives who might be reading this. You are my heroes as well. Releasing your husbands on their day off to build a deck is a huge sacrifice, and one I don’t take lightly. Thank You, Thank You, Thank You.

Schedule Day Four: Exhaustion

2006-06-24T07:21:00.000-07:00

Friday's theme was definitely fatigue. It isn't that I'm doing anything all that difficult. But in order to keep the kids on a schedule, I have had to get more vigilent with my own schedule (back on track with rising early, getting the housework done as opposed to putting it off like I was before, etc.). So what I'm trying to determine now is if I have been overly ambitious on a few of our days, or if my body is just going through an adjustment period. I'll know more after next week. I was so grateful for the final article Carolyn wrote about scheduling. She quotes D.A. Carson

“So many Christians today identify themselves with some ‘single issue’ (a concept drawn from politics) other than the cross, other than the gospel. It is not that they deny the gospel. If pressed, they will emphatically endorse it. But their point of self-identification, the focus of their minds and hearts, what occupies their interest and energy is something else” (The Cross and Christian Ministry, p. 63).”

Sheduling, though it is proving to be a huge blessing, is not my "single issue", and I pray it doesn't become such. I hope that though I have spent time blogging about my adventures into schedule world, that I have not in any way made other moms feel badly if they aren't having a schedule, or feel discouraged because as they've implemented their schedule it hasn't gone as smoothly. Because I am just starting with the schedule, it is requiring a lot of mind-focus and energy, but I anticipate that as it becomes a part of the rhythm of our lives it will be less consuming. The other part of Carolyn's final exhortation that was helpful was that a schedule must be implemented humbly. I don't want to attempt this in my own feeble strength. I can see where in the beginning, I was acutely aware of my need for God's help to do this. Now, even in just a few days, I find myself praying less and less throughout the day for help and stamina. How kind of God to remind me through Carolyn's words, that pride is emerging in the form of self sufficiency, and it will lead to a fall. But grace is near as I humbly remain dependent on Him.

Schedule Day Three: Pool Time

2006-06-23T07:07:00.000-07:00

On our schedule in the afternoon is a three hour block time to either run errands or go to our community pool, or do both. The pool is a challenge for me because while I'm there I'm tempted to be thinking about other things I could be doing right now that are more "productive". But I love watching my children enjoy the pool, and one benefit is that it is a block of time when they need little correction, and get along beautifully. Yesterday, however, I wanted to be more intentional about expressing gratitude for the luxury of having a pool in our community. I am grateful that my boys still want to show off for me. They say, "mom, watch this..." a hundred times, and I love it. I am grateful that my girl is really committed to being a good swimmer. I can't believe how hard she works to keep up with the brothers. I am really grateful that yesterday, I was able to meet other moms in the neighborhood. In the past weeks the ladies who were there seemed to be hiding in their magazines, I-pods, or naps, but yesterday there were two other twin moms there (one with 2 year olds looking very frazzled) and one with 12 year olds. There was a mom with three sons really close in age, like mine as well. So God provided many inroads for friendships with ladies who are regulars at the pool. Opportunities for the gospel will abound. So, what does this have to do with my schedule? If there was an area I was tempted to avoid doing, it was this whole pool time. And yet God in His kindness opened my eyes to see that this is about more than providing fun for my children, it is an opportunity to be out in the world among other mothers who may not yet have believed the glorious Gospel of grace. Even my desire to keep a schedule itself must be an outworking of the gospel in my life. By the Holy Spirit's work, I desire to reflect the image of God as a woman. The way I reflect His image is in being a helper to my husband. It helps him to have order in our home. The schedule is a way to keep things orderly and running smoothly. It all really does come back to the gospel. The gospel gives me a new heart that is free to serve others, primarily my husband. The schedule is simply a practical way for me to do this. And sharing the gospel with other women is to be part of my life as well...I just didn't realize how the two (schedule and evangelism) would meet - at the pool.

Schedule Day Two: Tweaking

2006-06-21T18:55:00.000-07:00

The theme for today seemed to be that the schedule needs adjusting. For example, today I babysat my niece and nephew as I do every Wednesday. On the 2nd and 4th Wednesdays in the morning we go to playground playgroup. This is the 3rd Wednesday so the kids had a huge block of time that was unscheduled. They play so well together that it’s not a problem, but later in the day we skipped our silent reading because they were enjoying building a tent and making stores in the basement. If I had thought it through better, I could have used part of the morning play time for the reading. I also think I need to schedule in snack times. No sooner do I begin vacuuming a bedroom when one of the kids comes up asking for a snack. By the fourth interruption, I find myself impatient and angry. When they were little I scheduled mid morning snack and late afternoon snack, but once they became more independent and I could just say, “get a granola bar out of the cabinet,” I stopped scheduling them. This will be an adjustment for my boys in particular. One of them is so skinny I hate to not give him food every time he asks, but I’ll be sure the snack in the afternoon is a big one, and maybe make breakfast and lunch bigger as well. My husband was helpful when I was explaining to him that though I am getting things done on the schedule, I’m not always doing them at the times allotted. I think it’s important to stick to the times pretty strictly at first, in order to create a “rut” of habit for the wagon of childhood to roll smoothly in (thank you Charlotte Mason). He said the schedule is supposed to serve you, not you serve the schedule. So, I am still enjoying the schedule and being able to direct the kids as to what is next, but I am seeking wisdom for where to put a few things on days that don’t follow a normal routine, as well as being sure the daily routine stuff is in the right place at the right time. Well, I gotta go...6 minutes til bath/shower time begins. If they go to the pool, do I really have to give them a bath? I'm thinkin' chlorine pretty much takes care of it, don't you?

Schedule Day One: Unexpected Honeymoon Phase

2006-06-20T18:59:00.000-07:00

I fully anticipated today would be our “baptism of fire” in getting into a routine. After all, school is over, and due to putting together a garage sale one week, and my back and shoulder pain the next (thanks to said garage sale) we just came off of two weeks of unlimited play time, more videos than usual, and lower standards for orderliness. Today, however, was not filled with complaints and resistance by the kids. In fact, I am happy to report that they were excited to have a special summer schedule. This never happens to me. I am the one who reads the article written by the mother extraordinaire, think to myself, “hey – that sounds great! I am going to do that!” And then, somewhere between that thought and the execution of that thought I find myself experiencing something so different from what was described in the innocent article. Perhaps it’s the cynic in me, and perhaps its past experience that makes me think of today as a sort of “honeymoon” period. I mean, really, in a brief discussion during dinner of things we were grateful for today one of my children actually said, “I’m grateful for our new schedule!” Okay, It’s only fair to admit that today’s schedule just happens to be the one day of the week that is particularly kid-centered. We went to a free movie at our local cinema, did the dollar menu with friends at McDonalds afterward, hit the pool, and finished the day with going to daddy’s softball game (at Beachmont Christian Camp –a.k.a. little boy heaven). This is an unusually “fun-filled” day, so of course they loved it. But still, they worked on their math facts, did their reading, and even helped with some of my housework. I think my experience tomorrow is going to give us all a better idea of what this whole scheduled life is like. But if it encourages any of you out there to jump in and try, I want you to know that the Girls are right, kids really do thrive on order and routine. What about me? The kids did great, but what about the Mom? Actually, all of my feelings were inclined toward getting some sense of order back in the home – so this helped. As I said before, my two anticipated weaknesses are that when I don’t feel like doing something on the schedule, it will be harder to implement. The area of legalism is also a concern. Today I believe I am truly considering it all grace that things went so well. There was, however, one point during the day when I sinned against one of my children (not schedule related), and detected that my heart felt less guilt than usual and deceitfully reminded me that “at least I have kept my schedule”. In a subtle way, I was using my good work as some sort of conscience anesthetic. I am grateful that the Holy Spirit immediately stopped me in my tracks and I was able to recognize the pride and legalism, confess it, and receive forgiveness. So I end this day full of gratitude for God’s kindness to me and my family in helping us be happy in following a schedule. I am grateful for so many fun things that happened today as well. And most of all I end this day aware that God receives all of the glory for any success we had. Until tomorrow….

A Brave Blog Week

2006-06-19T06:56:00.000-07:00

When the Girls Talk, I listen. And the routine talk resonated with me because even before the first outstanding article Nicole wrote on the topic, I was beginning to see the need for the day to be better scheduled especially in light of school being over. I am going to do something brave this week. I am going to try to blog about my journey in implementing the Reyes Family Schedule. Why is this brave? Well, it’s brave because I’m determined to be honest about the process which for me and my children is going to be challenging. I decided to this for two reasons: first, for a bit of added accountability. My mom and a friend of mine named Kathy (extremely organized kind of gal) are my real life accountability partners here, but I can’t help but think that if I’m going to have to write a little something at the end of the day for my bloggin’ buddies to read there will be additional incentive to stick to the schedule. Second, I think it might help some others who are interested in the suggestion to schedule their children’s lives. Something about hearing another person trying, failing, and trying again helps. And third, I'm in need of a little inspiration for writing lately...this will provide plenty - perhaps more than you're willing to read :)! Mondays are my husband’s day off, so the schedule will begin tomorrow. I am making a few adjustments to it today, thanks to Kathy’s helpful questions. The primary challenges I anticipate encountering will be my “feelings”. If I don’t “feel” like doing the schedule, or if I don’t “feel” like tackling the potential discipline issues that will come up this first week, it will be hard for me to overcome those feelings or lack thereof and actually do what I planned. I also know my tendencies toward legalism and believe that I could turn this blessing of a schedule into a means for self-righteousness, or condemnation. This morning in Charles Spurgeon’s devotional, Morning and Evening, I was kindly reminded by God that the source for living a life that honors and glorifies Him is always the Holy Spirit. “Rich were the blessings of this day if all of us were filled with the Holy Ghost. The consequences of this sacred filling of the soul it would be impossible to overestimate. Life, comfort, light, purity, power, peace; and many other precious blessings are inseparable from the Spirit's benign presence. As sacred oil, He anoints the head of the believer, sets him apart to the priesthood of saints, and gives him grace to execute his office aright. As the only truly purifying water He cleanses us from the power of sin and sanctifies us unto holiness, working in us to will and to do of the Lord's good pleasure.” So today, as I prepare to put my schedule into practice, I pray that the Holy Spirit would “anoint” my head and give me the “grace to execute [my] office aright.” I pray I would be dependent on Him (not my ability to implement a schedule) for purifying, sanctifying, and working in me to will and to do His good pleasure.

Quotable Kiddos: Cleaning

2006-06-17T16:30:00.000-07:00

We were walking by an arcade in the mall and Caleb saw a lady with a feather duster cleaning one of the games and he said with great enthusiasm, “look mom, a cleaning game!” The funny thing is that he thought I’d just love playing something like that. We were listening to a Sovereign Grace worship cd in the car and one of the vocalists does a worshipful embellishment singing, “He washes me clean” referring to Jesus. Maggie said after hearing the line, “He watches me clean?” I thought to myself, “well, yeah, that too.”

Training Little Ones

2006-06-14T05:12:00.000-07:00

Kenneth Maresco recently did a short series on training younger children called Nourish, Instruct, Discipline. The MP3 files are now available here. I am certain, based on teaching he has done in the past on the topic as well as the brief summaries given on the married life blog, that this is going to be extremely helpful to all who listen and seek to apply. And by the way, if you don't have children yet, or you have big kids - I encourage you to listen as well so that you may come alongside others who are in this season.

Salt Scrub for Smooth Summer Skin

2006-06-09T12:55:00.000-07:00

I have been a huge fan of skin-exfoliating salt scrubs for years now. They can be a bit pricey, so I was delighted when a friend of mine gave me a homemade salt scrub as a gift last year. I've been making my own ever since. It's really inexpensive and easy. Just in case you are not familiar with how to use a salt scrub, I'll give you the instructions for use before I give you the instructions for making it. Basically salt scrub is a moisturizing exfoliant. You use it all over your body (or just arms and legs if other skin is sensitive...definitely not face) in the shower, then rinse with water (or if you feel too oily, wash with soap afterward). Your skin will feel fantastic, I promise! Two things to remember, first, this isn't bath salt. You use it in the shower as a scrub. Use it before you shave, not after. That would sting like crazy. Used before hand will help give you a great shave. And if you're a self-tanning cream girl, the exfoliant is perfect to use before you slather that stuff on. 1. Find a suitable container. I use an empty container from a Bath & Body scrub I used before I started making my own. 2. Take Epsom salt (less than $2) and pour it in almost to the top. 3. Pour baby oil (less than $2) in with the espsom salt until the mixture looks like slushy snow. I add oil, mix, add oil, mix...until it's the slushy consistency I want it to be. (I use the end of an old toothbrush to mix) If you want, you can make this fancier like my friend and add color and fragrance. I have tried adding a bit of mineral oil in with the baby oil during the winter because my skin was so dry. I store the epsom salt and baby oil under the sink in my bathroom and use it whenever (I can make about 4 pots of scrub with one bag of salt, and one bottle of oil). Also, I stick to baby oil because the fragrance doesn't compete with my perfume. Enjoy!

Talk About Scheduling

2006-06-08T12:09:00.000-07:00

I am so excited about this little series Girl Talk is doing on scheduling/routine. I don't know how I would have made it through the baby/toddler years without a rather detailed schedule. Interestingly, as the kids have grown older and are able to entertain themselves better, I have used scheduling outside of meals, school, and my beloved blanket time (which is erratic of late)rather less. After reading Nicole's post today, I am thinking about devising a "big kid" schedule. This is our first week off from schooling, and I already have that miserable aimless feeling - I think my kids do as well. For their sake, and my own I think a summer routine is in order! Thanks again to the ladies at Girl Talk.

The Israelites and I...

2006-06-07T05:23:00.000-07:00

Ahhh, the Israelites. Just when I’m tempted to judge them for their chronic complaining, unbelief, and idolatry, I see my own face among the masses. Today I read Deuteronomy 11 where they are told to obey the command “to love the LORD your God, and to serve him with all your heart and with all your soul” (vs. 13). They are told that obedience to this command will result in God’s provision in watering their land, keeping it fertile, as well as military protection and victory. They are warned about the curse that will result from idolatry and disobedience. Like the Israelites, I am commanded to love God and serve Him today. It might look a bit different in my 21st century home. It may look like unloading and loading a dishwasher, or reading the last two chapters of The Matchlock Gun to the boys. It might look like praying for my grandmother, or inviting a baseball mom to church on Sunday. How amazing that these ordinary little acts can be expressions of love for God and service to Him today. Like the Israelites, I am tempted to be deceived by the lure of idolatry. It is more dangerous than setting up a little golden something or other in the kitchen because these idols are invisible and harder to detect. I can be cleaning a room of my house and be serving the idol of “order” and “productivity”, all the while neglecting the children I’m called to train. I can serve the idol of “comfort” and “ease” when I choose to read blogs over reading The Matchlock Gun. Idolatry is always at the door of my heart. This makes obedience to the command to love and to serve the Lord with all my heart and my soul very difficult…impossible except for the fact that… Unlike the Israelites, I can obey. Because God so loved the world, that He gave Jesus, His son, to die on the cross for my sins, I can now obey the command to love and serve Him. It is because Jesus loved and served first that we can now love and serve Him. What better catalyst to obedience is there than pondering the obedience of the Savior? What better motivation to love than beholding what manner of love the Father has given unto us, that we should be called the sons of God! And what fuel for service surpasses considering the Son of Man not coming to be served, but to serve and give His life as a ransom for many. Yes, my face is in the crowd of Israelites listening to the command to love and serve the Lord. But my face is also turned to my Savior today as I seek to obey Him here in 21st century Abingdon, MD. It is by His obedience to the command to love and serve the Father perfectly that I have hope today to seek to do the same.

Another Blog to Add to the List

2006-06-06T06:05:00.000-07:00

If you haven't discovered it yet, Gospel Driven Life is a blog written by Mark Lauterbach, a pastor from California. I especially appreciated this post from yesterday. Enjoy!

The Law and The Gospel

2006-06-05T05:02:00.000-07:00

"Run, Laurie, Run!" the Law demands But gives us neither feet nor hands; Far better news the Gospel brings, It bids us fly, and gives us wings. -John Bunyan (as quoted by John Piper here)

Family Night With Little Guys

2006-06-03T05:25:00.000-07:00

A pattern emerged when our children were younger. I would be with the kids all day. Jason would come home and play with them while I finished dinner. After dinner one of us would do baths while the other did some other thing, and then before we knew it - bedtime. It dawned on me one day how little time we all spent together during this season of our lives. It was like we were constantly giving each other a break due to the intensity of the season. So, before I give a few ideas about what to do with the little guys for family night, you must know that our family did these things more sporadically and spontaneously...not every week on a certain night. I would never want to portray myself as some sort of super-mama, when I know all too well that family night in the early years could range from chaotic to sanctifying for all involved. Therefore, it was inconsistent. A few ground rules: 1. Have reasonable expectations. Fun family night playing bingo or having a dippin' dinner is just around the corner, but with little ones you need to remember that their attention span is short, frustration level high, and capacity to just do stuff is limited. 2. Keep it short. A few ideas: 1. Family coloring. My kids just love it when Jason and I sit at the table and color with them. If they are still at the scribbling age, that's okay. We found that the boys liked the velvet poster things because it looked good no matter what the coloring abilities were. 2. For the brave: family playdough night. Same as family coloring, but with playdough. Just so you know, homemade playdough is much better because it doesn't break up into a million little crumbs (how do kids manage to make such a crumby mess with playdough, anyway?!) 3. Dippin' dinner variation: any meal on a picnic blanket watching a video is cool to little guys. It can be a happy meal, or pbj...if the entire family is sitting on a blanket calling it an indoor picnic, it will feel special.(even if your 2 yr. old can't sit still for five minutes :)). 4. A few fun games we played: Hide The Object: Make sure you have something (stuffed animal worked for us) for each child to find, then your older one won't keep winning. Make it really obvious so they don't get frustrated. You can do this fifty times and they won't get bored. Dance: Get out some funky dance music and dance with your kids. They'll love it. I explain our version (freeze dance) here. My kids love seeing us get down and boogie, though I assure you, it isn't a pretty sight. Simon Says without anything tricky. Just have them follow the orders. Sometimes just hopping on one foot can be a huge victory for the little ones. Bucking Bronco on daddy's back. I would count to see how long they could stay on Jason's back while he pretended to be the bucking bronco. Yes, everyone ends up hurt....but it's worth it. (Toughens up the boys! They beg for more.) The main thing is to just be together with your little guys. Even if you're doing something completely ordinary, just doing it together as a family, laughing and enjoying each other, is a culture you will build on. It seems obvious enough, but sometimes in the craziness of caring for their physical needs it is easy to really not spend a lot of time together as a family until they are older and more manageable. Even though it is different when they're toddlers and pre-schoolers, it is still so much fun...if you keep your expectations low, and time short! Hope that's helpful! Anybody else want to chime in?

Dippin' Dinners

2006-06-02T04:37:00.000-07:00

Like most of my ideas for the kiddos, this is borrowed from a number of moms I know who do some variation of Dippin' Dinners. For family night sometimes we spread a picnic blanket (vinyl top) on the floor; put small bowls for the dippin' (ketchup, honey mustard, bar-b-que, and ranch dressing) in the middle of the blanket; arrange the various finger foods around the dips; give each person a paper plate, juice pouch, and napkins, napkins,& more napkins; put on a movie and voila! We have Dippin' Dinner! Our favorite menu includes the following: pizza bites, corn dog nuggets, chicken nuggets, baby carrots, cucumbers, and green peppers. I'm sure there is a healthier variation. My sister does fancier appetizers with her kids who are older. Also, if we weren't so messy, we'd play a game instead of watch a movie. At our season, we can't dip and do a game at the same time. Some time I want to do a dippin' dessert with marshmallowshmellows, and pound cake. What do you do for family night?

Two Tireds

2006-06-01T04:23:00.000-07:00

Two men. Two boats. Two different kinds of tired. I have often considered these two men sleeping in boats when I come to the end of my day and find myself exhausted. We find Jonah asleep in the boat as he tries to run from God’s will for his life. “But Jonah had gone down into the inner part of the ship and had lain down and was fast asleep.” Jonah 1:5 I have been like Jonah, trying to take the socially acceptable “boat” away from what God has called me to in the home. Maybe it is the S.S. Blogger, or the S.S. Book, or the S.S. Target, or the S.S. Telephone. Maybe it simply laziness, or doing what I feel like doing as opposed to doing what needs to get done. Even though blogging, reading, shopping, and talking on the phone are as innocent as a boat ride in and of themselves, I know in my heart when I am using them to escape God’s will for my life. It is strangely fatiguing. In striking similarity and contrast we see Jesus asleep in a boat. “And behold, there arose a great storm on the sea, so that the boat was being swamped by the waves; but he was asleep.” (Matt 8:24) He was tired for the opposite reason Jonah was asleep: He completely obeyed the will of His Father. I obviously can’t claim to be like Jesus here. But, by His grace, there are days when I am completely exhausted for very different reasons. I remember Douglas Wilson saying something to the effect that mothers of young children should feel tired each day, it means they’re doing their job right (does anybody have this quote?). Indeed, when I do my job (calling/ministry) over here, it is very tiring. There is nothing wrong with being really, really tired at the end of the day. It could be an indication that I am doing what God has called me to do. But when I come to the end of my day, what brings rest to my soul is the same regardless of my performance: Jesus perfectly obeyed the Father, and His perfect obedience has been accredited to me. It is in His righteousness that I go to bed each night…not my own. Ahhh, such peace and rest is found here. The One who could say to the raging seas, “peace, be still” has said these words to my heart on my best day, and my worst. The Prince of Glory, who had no need to ever sleep or slumber, humbled Himself to be clothed in human frailty and as we see here, feel exhausted. Astounding! Why would He do this? Jesus perfectly obeyed the Father in his life, and in His death on the cross in order to save us from our sins, and bring us to God to the praise of His glory alone. Now, because of His work on my behalf, I can climb into the boat of obedience today. And when I lay my head down tonight, hopefully exhausted in the right way, I will find my rest in His work, not my own.

Just Passing It On

2006-05-29T05:12:00.000-07:00

With all of the rubbish you find on the world wide web, it is always nice to be able to pass on something that is helpful. I recently began using my laptop for my quiet time journal, and now Bible reading. I thought I would never give up my fancy journals and pens - but it is so much more practical to keep one place for everything. I can cut and paste verses and quotes into my to-do list (I think I got that idea from Carolyn Mahaney, but i'm not sure). Or if I'm e-mailing somebody, I can insert scripture more readily to encourage that individual. This year I am using D.A. Carson's For the Love of God companion book in order to read through the Bible in a year. I am loving this! He uses the M'Cheyenne schedule of reading. I found the ESV online has the M'Cheyenne readings here. I put it in my favorites and go there each morning. I never thought I would be able to read my Bible on a computer screen, but I've adjusted, and love being able to cut and paste sections of scripture into my journal for the day. Just thought I'd pass it along, I'm sure many of you already know about it. Also, I just subrscribed to bloglines. By subscribing to various blog feeds I am able to check my blogs much faster because bloglines tells me which ones have been updated. So now I'm not checking my favorite blog each day to see if they posted, bloglines does that for me. It's hard to explain, just go there, and trust me it will save you time on your blog reading. I also find myself spending measured time on blogs rather than clicking aimlessly here and there. I know some of you already use this and if you can explain it better, please do so in my comment box.

Homeschool Day At Six Flags

2006-05-26T05:51:00.000-07:00

What makes homeschool day different from other days at Six Flags? What other day do you see more yamikas and Mennonite head coverings than baseball caps? What other day do I feel like we have a relatively small family? What day at the amusement park do you see more ankle length denim skirts than bikini clad teenagers? While we're on the topic of homeschool fashion, let me just say that I have never seen more color coordinated families in my life donning t-shirts saying things like (Bev, where's yours? :) ) Only at homeschool day would such things happen! All this to say, we had a fantastic time! We will do it again next year, Lord willing! BTW, how do you spell yamika? (hey, I wasn't homeschooled, what can I say?)

The Rock In My Kitchen

2006-05-24T06:25:00.000-07:00

There is a rock gushing with water in my kitchen today. Actually, it is in every room of my home, in my mini van, even at Target, the library, and the doctor’s office. I was reminded of this rock reading Psalm 73 this morning. In verses 19-20 Asaph is telling a younger generation about the wickedness of their forefathers when they questioned the more-than-proven power of God to provide for them. 19 They spoke against God, saying, “Can God spread a table in the wilderness?20 He struck the rock so that water gushed out and streams overflowed. It is easy to look at the Israelites and think, “how could they…” And yet if I am honest, I struggle with the very same unbelief. Do I really believe that God has provided everything I need to live for His glory? Do I believe that God is able to change me, and my children to look more like Jesus? Do I believe that all that my heart craves can really be satisfied in Him? I say with man in Mark 9:24 “I believe, help my unbelief.” The hope for the Israelites and for me is found later in the psalm. Verse 35 says, they remembered that God was their rock. The Rock of my salvation is Jesus. Because He was struck, on the cross, living water flows to me. It cleanses me from my sin. It satisfies my thirst. I want to go there all day long. I want to bring my children there. I want to bring others I am in contact with there. God, please help me to remember the Rock gushing with living water today whether it is at a table in the wilderness, or the table in the homeschool room.

Primo Piper

2006-05-23T05:25:00.000-07:00

If you haven't read his book, When I Don't Desire God: How To Fight For Joy, you might consider listening to a series John Piper taught on the the same subject back in April. For whatever reason I can't get the archives to pull part one, but this link is for part two. You can find the parts at Desiring God Ministries Radio in the archives section. I highly recommend this book. It is one of my all time favorite Piper books (very readable!). But, if you have small children at home, don't prefer reading, or just don't have the time to read...consider listening to these teachings online instead.

Topsy Turvy Take Two

2006-05-22T04:50:00.000-07:00

I attempted the topsy turvy cake for Abby's surprise party yesterday. This time I didn't cover the entire cake in fondant because buttercream tastes better. But still, the fondant would have given a much smoother finish to the cake. I found a recipe for fondant that some people at the party actually liked. That makes it much less expensive to make these cakes as well. I used it for the bow and accent pieces.(Sorry the picture is fuzzy. I don't know why that happened!)

Briana's Comment

2006-05-19T16:52:00.000-07:00

I wanted to publish the comment Briana left on my last post. It is evidence of the beautiful work of grace I have witnessed in my dear friend's life.

Laurie, Thanks for posting this. How true this is, and while my faith falters (you are well acquainted with what that looks like for me), I do stand back at times amazed at the good work God's doing in me and those around me through Judah's suffering. A while back I came across this quote from Spurgeon. It was short enough to remember, and its truth has never been more felt than in the last several days: "Happy is the suffering that loosens our grip on earth." When we came back from the opthamologist on Wednesday night and began to grow more acquainted with the intensity these last couple days were going to hold for us, I went to my book shelf and pulled out, "In Light of Eternity". It is clear that God has written eternity on our hearts. It is what we long for, and one of my prayers is that those who encounter us at Hopkins will get a taste of the longing in their own hearts for God and for Heaven by interacting with us.

Bri, we will all be praying for you. Thank you for your example to us all.

You Give And Take Away

2006-05-19T05:26:00.000-07:00

This week Jason and I have been eyewitness observers of an extraordinary range of life experiences. Tuesday we visited our friends the Brittons who just had their first baby, a beautiful little boy named William. This Saturday we will attend the wedding of two young people from our church. On the other end of the spectrum, yesterday we went to a memorial service for a young man who died tragically last week. We also have been praying for our dear friends the Almengors who have been practically living at the hospital with their baby, Judah, due to unexpected elevated pressure on his optic nerve, causing a great deal of frustrating uncertainty as to why this is happening, and how to treat it. On the car ride between the memorial service and luncheon that followed, Jason and I were talking about the amazing fact that the joy of gifts like a child or a spouse, and the pain of severe trial like death or disease can have the same end: greater longing for God in Heaven. If we receive gifts and blessings and fall in love with the blessing itself, not looking to the hand of Love from which they come, we are more tied to this earth. Gifts are intended to increase our affection for the Giver, and thus increase our longing for Him. The ultimate blessing will be an eternity in His presence in Heaven. All of the good things we encounter here on earth are mere foretastes of what awaits us in Heaven. Pain and suffering also potentially create a longing for God. This world is fallen and full of trouble. Tragic events like the pain of losing a beloved son remind us that we are not home. We long for a better place where there will be no more tears of sorrow. We long for Heaven, not just from the relief of suffering, but for the joy of living in God’s presence. Trials and suffering wean us from this world, and help us to long for our true home: Heaven where the Prince of Glory dwells. I am well acquainted with the blessings of life. I pray that I will remember the Giver of the gift, and grow in love and longing for Him. Profound suffering is still foreign to me. Yet I know that if I live long enough, hardship will come my way. I pray I will be like Sandy and Sal Barranco, Lawrence and Briana Almengor, and so many others I have watched long for God more in the midst of suffering. May our hearts echo what we sang at Tim’s memorial service yesterday: You give and take away My heart will choose to say Lord, blessed be Your name.

Have More Courage

2006-05-16T04:44:00.000-07:00

This little commercial is so clever, I had to pass it on. Hope you enjoy it as much as we did. (it might take a minute to get going. It's a white blank screen for a few seconds, then the video begins)

My Favorite Mother

2006-05-15T08:08:00.000-07:00

I find myself putting her at the center of my life. I go to great lengths to see that she is comfortable and her life as easy as possible. When someone exposes her sin, I sometimes make her feel better by comparing her with others, or making an excuse for why she did what she did. I think she should be revered at times, even though she proves herself unworthy so often. Who is this mother I love most…ME, of course! I don’t want to love myself so much. Life goes spiraling out of control when I try to be at the center of it. Selfishness makes wife and motherhood a virtual impossibility. Yet I find the battle for my heart to be always raging. Many times I begin my day with prayers such as, “O God, please help me to live for You today. Help me to love Your glory more than anything else. Satisfy my soul in You that I might not look for inferior things to indulge myself with.” Then it happens. Life begins. One of the children wakes up early and my quiet time (you know, the time when I’m praying to die to myself, and live for God’s glory) gets interrupted, and immediately I am confronted with the choice between living for my favorite mother, or living for the glory of God. It is here, in the minutia of life, that I choose whom to live for everyday. Augustine said, “Every moment in every circumstance, we stand on the brink between the lure of idolatry and the delight of seeing and knowing God.” In circumstances such as, overhearing the children arguing in the basement I can either serve the idol of comfort and pretend I don’t hear anything, or see that God is in this opportunity and I (and my children) have a chance to know Him better because of it. It means that when my husband goes to play golf this afternoon, I either worship the idol of me, and make him feel he owes me something because he was gone for so long, or I find my delight in God and release him to enjoy the time with his friends. It means that choosing things that at times confront the “golden me” like doing the laundry, training the children, making my husband’s favorite dinner, can be opportunities to enjoy seeing and knowing God more. How is this possible? I know that the One who is truly at the center of the entire universe, the giver and sustainer of life, the only glorious One, came to earth in the form of a man. “and being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore God has highly exalted Him and bestowed on Him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus, every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.” Phil. 2:8-11 Because of His death on the cross, I am now set free to worship Him with my life, and love others instead of myself. Today, in the so-called minutia of life, I will stand on that brink between idolatry and the delight of seeing and knowing God. May I choose over and over to dive into that for which I was created: the joy of living for God’s glory alone.

My Mother In Law

2006-05-13T05:59:00.000-07:00

She loved him first. She loves him deeply. She is my mother in law. I can’t say how many times I have thanked God for the faithfulness of this godly mother. Every time I see her influence in my husband’s life I truly have heart felt gratitude for Debbie Reyes. In His sovereignty, God graciously used the example and training of his mother (and father, but hey…we’re talking moms right now) to lead my husband to Christ at an early age, and train him in the way he should go. He was raised in a godly environment from birth, and claims to have been born on Saturday, in church on Sunday. His love for the church, and passion for God are the continuing legacy that started many generations ago, passed on to him by his parents. I have undoubtedly, the best husband I personally know of – don’t roll your eyes - it’s true! I attribute this to God’s grace at work through the influence of Jason’s mother. There are some things that I directly see evidence of Debbie’s influence on the leader of our home. I am grateful that Debbie taught my husband how to communicate with a woman. He never gives the one word answer or grunt as is so often portrayed in male stereotypes. He gives details, he asks questions. I know he learned this through consistent communication with his mother. I am grateful that Debbie taught my husband how to be a gentleman. He always holds the door open, and pulls out the chair. He doesn’t miss an opportunity to express gratitude for any way that I serve him. He keeps my gas tank full so that I don’t have to pump gas. He carries in the groceries if he’s around when we go shopping. He brings home flowers spontaneously, and goes antiquing with me (his love for history helps us here, but still his mother has always loved antiques). More than what she has taught Jason with regard to how to “treat a girl”, is what he has learned from her by example and training spiritually. I am grateful that: Jason is tender hearted, like his mother. Jason seeks God daily through His Word and prayer, like his mother. Jason is a servant, like his mother. Jason works hard, like his mother. Jason loves excellence, like his mother. My husband has learned much through the faithful example and training of his mother. I am blessed to be learning from her as well. How kind of God to provide another amazing example of a Titus 2 woman in my life. What a privilege it is to have lengthy conversations of great depth with my mother in law. What a blessing to observe up close her walk with the Lord. She is an amazing lady, and I am truly grateful for her. I love and respect you so much, Debbie. Happy Mother’s Day

My Mom

2006-05-11T07:51:00.000-07:00

If you didn't catch it on Girl Talk, this is what I wrote to honor my Mom this year. This year, I don’t honor my mother for how she has served those who come behind her; I honor her for serving those who have gone before her. My mother’s world changed dramatically last year. My parents flew back and forth to Las Vegas and New Orleans many times to attend to ill parents. In April of 2005, my mother’s mom died and three days later my father’s dad died. Just four months after that, the flood in New Orleans resulted in my parents taking in my grandmother Cannon as well as my severely mentally handicapped Aunt. My mother was to be the primary caregiver for both. Yet in a whirlwind of airplanes, memorial services, floods, and hospitals my mother stayed the course of humble servant-hood. The day before my grandmother arrived I remember my mother looking shocked and numb. We were packing away her dining room in order to make room for two beds and a dresser. The table where we had so many Sunday dinners was disassembled. The beloved Turkey dishes for thanksgiving were put away. Every piece of silver and crystal was wrapped in paper and stored in the garage. My mom would tell you that she mourned the loss of part of her life that day. My mother was weak, but this positioned her to receive power from God like I have never seen demonstrated in her life. My mom fed, clothed, bathed, and cared for my 54 year old aunt with the tenderness she had for her own babies. This was amazing to behold. To compare the fear and anxiety of the day before Aunt Cathy arrived to the grace that caused my mother to truly view it as a privilege to serve this way has affected me more profoundly than my mother’s example in any other area. My mother says over and over that God did this. She takes no credit, and stands amazed at the grace in her life. Part of the means of that grace was her unwavering commitment to study God’s Word and pray, something my mother has faithfully modeled in every season of her life since her conversion. Sadly, my aunt died just months later after succumbing to a battle with pneumonia. My grandmother moved back to New Orleans recently, but has decided she will eventually live in Maryland. Even as I type my mother sits in a hospital room in New Orleans caring for my grandmother as she recovers from back surgery. My mom doesn’t know how long she will be in New Orleans, but once again God is giving her power and strength to serve her mother-in-law. My sister and I have always called my mother a steel magnolia. She is from the south, and her favorite tree is the magnolia tree. Images of magnolias are sprinkled throughout her house as a reminder of her southern heritage. They are reminders to me of my mother. In the midst of intense heat, she stays strong like a magnolia. The source of her strength is not the bloom itself, but the roots of faith that dig deep to reach the streams of living water that are her source of life. I miss you mom. Thank you for your faithful example of humble servant-hood, perseverance, and pursuit of the means of grace. Truly words will always fall short for how much I love and respect you. The Magnolia Tree For my mom on mother’s day By Laurie Reyes The Magnolia tree in New Orleans Lifted up her limbs Toward the heat of summer sun Drinking daylight in. Never do the steel blooms wither Never do they fade Even through the fearful flood Her blossoms show their grace. Her source of beauty does not lie Within her hearty flower But the root that reaches For deep waters is her power So whether the day brings blessed rain Or blazing summer heat The steel magnolia thrives and drinks From a Fountain hid beneath. Such glory does the tree display In blossom laden bower Passersby can’t help admire Strength with Beauty’s power.

My Sister

2006-05-10T04:42:00.000-07:00

Karyn and I joke that I am her first born child. She says she still has a hard time believing that mom and dad didn't bring me home just for her. Karyn was four when I was born and pretty much, has loved me passionately from that time forward. I am grateful to be so loved! Even more than being the recipient of strong maternal love from Karyn, I am grateful for the example she is to me as a mother. It is hard to narrow down what I appreciate most about my sister as a mom, but probably the three biggest things Karyn excels in are how she enjoys her children, her laser sharp perception into their hearts, and her humble refusal to take any credit for her kids being so good. Karyn and Dan say that Sierra, 13, and Daniel, 10, are the other couple they do things with. Truly they would rather be with their kids than anyone else. From family game night to spontaneous trips to Ritas, Karyn and Dan are all about spending quality time with their children. This is not some compulsive duty that they read about in a parenting book. It is truly the result of not just loving her children, but really liking them. No one makes her laugh harder than her kids. The result is a family with extremely close family ties. Karyn, as the mother, has been the primary facilitator of the relationships this family enjoys. No one has taught me more about getting to the heart of a matter than my sister (who learned from my mother). Karyn is an astute observer of individuals. She never takes behavior at face value. From the beginning of mothering, Karyn has been diligent to discern the heart behind the issue. It is one thing to read about "shepherding a child's heart" in a book, it is another to watch it in action. I am grateful for Karyn's discernment, and counsel for my own heart as well as my children's. Probably the most important thing about Karyn as a mother is that even though she has really good kids (and believe me, they are amazing!), she always gives God glory for it, and sincerely believes it is only because He has been merciful in spite of her weakness. Now, I have just cited two strengths in Karyn's mothering, which I know are evidences of grace, but still - she appropriates this grace. She will be extremely uncomfortable being commended, because she is truly humble and counts it all grace. I want to be like her in this above all things. I want to humbly acknowledge that any success in parenting is the mercy and grace of God, not my ability to apply a few principles here and there. Thanks Karyn. I love you and am glad Mom and Dad brought me home for you!

My SILs

2006-05-09T07:50:00.000-07:00

Two of my favorite moms are my sister-in-laws, Abby and Emily. These ladies are part of my life by their connection to my brother and my husband, but I am happy to say they are part of my life as two of my closest friends. It is a joy to watch these young moms in action. And even though I walk a little bit before them in terms of life experience, in many ways they are walking ahead of me in character as mothers especially. Emily is Jason's younger sister. She has Iris, 3 (turning four in October), and Asher who just turned 1 last March (on Emily's birthday!). I have known Emily since she was 13, and what a delight to watch her walk through various seasons of life with such grace and dignity. She is walking in motherhood similarly. When I think of Em as a mom, two evidences of grace come to mind. First, Emily enjoys her children. She is always laughing at their latest antics, and has that sparkle in her eye anytime she sees, or speaks of her kiddos. It began in the hospital with IrisÂs birth. I have never seen a mother so euphoric! It will remain a precious memory for me seeing Emily rejoice profoundly, not just in her new role, but in her new baby. The second evidence of grace I see in Emily is that she has maintained an outward focus during the season of life that is accompanied by a temptation to be consumed with only "me and mine". She organizes special "girls' night out" throughout the year. She plans for close friends' birthdays. When our friend Beth lived in Boston, Emily would coordinate a gathering of friends to greet her when she came back for a visit. Even just in normal conversation, Emily will focus on the other person by drawing them out and showing interest in their life, rather than make herself or her kids the centerpiece for discussion. I want to be like Emily in these things. I am grateful to God for her example. Abby is my little brother's wife, and mother to Jack, who just turned three, and Charli, who is one (just three weeks older than Asher). If I could use one defining word for Ab as a mother it would be contentment. Abby is the most content individual I have personally ever known. This results in a peace and rest of soul that is a comfort to be around. There have been numerous times when this contentment has shined through. When Jack was born, Ab had a c-section that didn't heal properly. This made recovery much longer, and yet Ab did not complain at all. She graciously embraced the season with contentment and trust in God. After Charli was born, Ab and Jim were packing a house to move in with my parents while Jim worked very long hours on their newly purchased fixer-upper. Rather than grumble and complain, Abby did what needed to be done. She was content to move in with her in-laws, and continues to wait patiently for her own house, truly with no complaint. The reason the house has taken so long to fix-up has been due to the interruption of schedule by my grandmother and aunt coming from New Orleans last fall. My brother flew down several times to either get my grandmother, work on the house, or serve in various other ways that my parents were unable, taking him away from work on his own house (which was impossible to work on during winter months due to frozen ground). Abby did not complain about this shift of plans, but was fully supportive of Jimmy putting his efforts into serving my mom and dad, grandmother and aunt. More than not demand he work on her house, more than release him to do these things, Ab herself cared heroically for my grandmother in particular while my mom was caring for Aunt Cathy. Truly I am grateful for my precious sister in law who laid aside her life to serve others, in this case not just Jimmy, Jack, and Charli, but my grandmother as well. All of this with no complaint, but with peaceful contentment. I love you little mammas! What a joy to watch and learn from you both.

Ordinary Heroes: Redefining Greatness

2006-05-08T07:29:00.000-07:00

In light of Mother's Day I wanted to post a few things to honor some of my favorite moms. I wrote this post in January of '05, but hope it encourages all of the ladies out there who are heroically serving their families. It is an impressive group...including the likes of Elisabeth Elliot, Amy Carmichael, Elisabeth Scott Stam, and Gladys Aylward. These were the heroes of my single years. I dreamed of being like these ladies. I imagined myself in various scenarios like jungle huts, orphan asylums, ministry to other women, and maybe even writing a book to chronicle my adventures. These women made a difference in the world, an obvious difference. Echoes of their lives lived in consecration to God still ring in the hearts of many. Something happened, however, after I was married with children. My heroes changed. I don't know when exactly, but at some point I began to look around me at women in my church. Women whom I would have respected, but not thought of as "heroic". But now, now that I am doing what I am doing, and realizing how hard it is to do well, I view them differently. At the top of my list is my mother. Now I know how she laid down her life for our family each and every day for many years. My new heroes are my friend Kathleen who with three children three years old and younger, patiently cared for them day and night for years while her husband finished an advanced degree. She did it with little complaint. She did it well. Then there is my other friend Kathy who with as much savvy as any CEO creatively runs her house on a limited budget to release her husband to pursue full-time ministry even though it meant a cut in pay. There are other friends who live with chronic aches and pains, yet still do housework and care for their toddler in spite of the pain. The newest additions to my list of heroes are the homeschool moms. One of them homeschools children in high school, junior high, and elementary school, with a toddler under foot as well. Another has homeschooled long enough to graduate two children. The list of heroes is ever growing. What I find heroic about these women is that their lives are composed of hundreds of choices to either obey God and glorify Him, in the mundane, or live life for themselves. These are simple choices in most cases, but hard choices, redundant choices, and unappreciated choices. They don't make one huge grand decision that lands them in a hut in Africa, they choose to get up and make breakfast. They choose to do laundry. They choose to lovingly correct a child. They choose to give baths before bedtime, tell a story, sing a song. They choose to teach a disrespectful 15 year old who would rather go to school. They live their lives primarily for others. This is not to say that the heroes of my single years have become any less heroic. But it is to say that I now understand that even their lives that seemed so deliciously radical were composed of the mundane choices of life as well. They were able to do big things well because they faithfully did the little things well. Perhaps this is not a redefining of heroes as much as it is the redefining of heroic. To all of you ordinary heroes out there, I want you to know I think you are extraordinary! Oh how the grace of God is exquisitely displayed in your lives. I also want to remind you that even though what you do is done in complete anonymity, there is One who sees it all. How pleased He must be.

Bright Shiny Good Works

2006-05-05T05:19:00.000-07:00

I found this post by Nicole Whitacre from Girl Talk to be extremely relevant for my life. She says,

After I’ve done a good work, I want to add it to my collection. I put it on my soul’s mantle and I polish it and step back to admire it. What a godly woman I am for doing such a good work! How nice it was to receive the thanks and appreciation of others! What a noble, self-sacrificing person I am! When I’m thinking like this, I’ve so missed the point. Good works are not an occasion for self-congratulation. They are a reason to marvel, once again, at my Savior. Only because of the blood that Jesus shed on the cross are my sins forgiven--not because of any good work I have done or will do. Only His grace motivates me to a life of good works. Only because of Christ’s mercy are my good works pleasing to the Father. Only His power sustains me for a lifetime of good works to His glory.

On this day, I pray that as I begin to walk in those good works God has ordained for me, that I will be quick to understand their source - the Savior, not me; and their purpose - His glory, not my own.

Reyes Ranch House

2006-05-04T07:36:00.000-07:00

This week Jason and I have been watching a reality show on PBS called Texas Ranch House. The premise is taking a group of 21st century individuals, and putting them in a simulated 1867 working ranch complete with cowboys, indians, the ranch owner, and his family. Mix in 110 degree weather, scant food, and a lot of physical labor and you have a rather fascinating little show. Not surprisingly, one appeal is watching the mindset of the current culture collide with that of a previous generation. It isn't really working. The women aren't happy being on the periphery of a male-dominated society. Some of the cowboys had a hard time listening to an older ranch manager. Two people have been fired, and the husband is torn between pleasing his wife and pleasing the cowboys making him an impotent leader on both fronts. Ahhh, reality t.v. at its finest. Before yesterday's episodes came on Jason said he was thinking about how he can watch this show and view their problems the way the rest of the world might view them. For example, they would be happier if they just got rid of so-and-so. Or, if the wife would just back off of her husband, maybe he would regain the respect of some of the cowboys and they would work better for him. Basically, a change of circumstances, management style, or people would facilitate success. Jason continued to say that the thought occured to them that of course, the Gospel is the only thing that can make such a situation work out. It is always the solution to the problems at hand. Without the gospel people in any time period are doomed to fail. I got to thinking. Do you ever wonder if your life is some crazy reality show and at any minute a camera man is going to come out of the garage and a director will then inform you that this whole thing is some crazy show? I can imagine the creative team putting together the premise for my reality show: "let's take a selfish woman prone to anger and impatience, somewhat disorganized, little to no experience with children and lets give her three of her own kids in less than two years. Make them all boys. For interest, let's add number four (girl) when the others are two and three years old. Eventually we'll add in a homeschool component (that will make for great t.v.)Voila! My reality. Like every good reality show there will be all sorts of twists and turns in the plot. The unexpected "what in the world just happened?" factor. Like for example last night's episode would have been called "travesty at the ball park: a melodrama". Anyway, you get the idea. Don't get the wrong idea, though. I love my reality. I love being a wife and mother and having three little boys and girl. I love homeschooling them. Truly my life is way better than I dreamed it could be, and certainly immensely better than I could ever deserve. But there is a problem sometimes. I want to be the star of my own show here. Whether it be in the form of the villain or the hero, I often put myself at the center of my world. The truth is there is a "Divine Director" of events at the Reyes Ranch House. He has written the various circumstances I find myself in. He has written in the unexpected twists and turns. God is at the center of our reality. He is sovereignly in control of everything each day. It is for God's glory that we exist here together. And just like the people from Texas Ranch House,It is not a change of circumstances or people that will solve our problems, it is the gospel. Jesus died on the cross for our sins so that we could be forgiven, set free to love one another, and enjoy access to the Father anytime and anywhere. My prayer is that we would glorify God by seeing Him at the center of our reality, and enjoy Him in the midst of everyday life. And when we fall short, may we run quickly to the throne of grace and receive forgiveness, grace to change, and rejoice in His glory once again.

Blessed Inadequacy

2006-05-03T05:12:00.000-07:00

I am comfortable with my ordinary-ness. But what I am not comfortable with is total inadequacy. And yet, today, like so many other days, I am faced with my inadequacy to do all that needs to get done in a way that glorifies God. I have a lot of housework to do. I have a lot of schoolwork to accomplish. I have errands to run, and a baseball game to attend. But more than these things, I have hearts to shepherd throughout the whole process: mine as well as my children's. This is what I find too difficult. I can clean. I can teach. I can even run from here to there. But can I deal with the inevitable interruptions, sinful attitudes, and relational conflict that are sure to accompany life today? And yet, here in the moments when I feel my inability to do the very life God has ordained for me, is where I can either look at myself and be discouraged, or look to God and have faith. Today, like so many other days, I am faced with my inadequacy, but I am turning my face away from me to my heavenly Father. He is generous with the abundance of grace at His disposal. This grace includes pardon for the sins that I will commit. And this grace includes strength to do the work He has called me to. I can bring my children to Him to do the same. It is God who will work in me to will and to do for His good pleasure. Father, help me to be grateful for the circumstances of life that keep me closer to reality about myself. My pride makes me want to be competent and capable in everything. But in your kindness you expose my weakness, not to discourage me, but to humble me and to show forth Your power which is made perfect in my weakness.

2 Peter 1:3 His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence

My Friends, The Mahaneys

2006-05-02T05:34:00.000-07:00

It was my Monday morning at Panera (a tradition my husband wisely implemented when my children were younger, to provide consistent time to be refreshed and re-envisioned for my life) and I brought with me a treasured friend, the book Humility, True Greatness, by C.J. Mahaney. It occurred to me while I was re-reading the first two chapters of this book, how often the Mahaneys have accompanied me to Panera via books and teachings. In fact, apart from my parents, I can’t think of any other individuals who have impacted my way of thinking and living more than C.J. and Carolyn Mahaney. Phrases like “The Cross”, “Evidences of Grace”, “Extravagant Devotion to the Savior”, “The Main Thing”, have become not just part of my vocabulary, but part of how I aim to live my life. These are words C.J. has provided to encapsulate profound concepts in scripture that would otherwise escape me in their significance. For example, through his teaching on the cross (as well as his book The Cross Centered Life) I have been provoked to view the cross as not only something done for me, but as something done by me. This was revelational because I have been mostly raised in the church my entire life and could have easily gone through life thinking erroneously, “I’m not that bad.” What riches of grace I have discovered in understanding the Cross better, truly I can’t express it here. I will never forget the first time I heard Carolyn’s teachings on Titus 2. It truly shapes the way I aim to pursue biblical womanhood. What a transforming effect hearing these teachings from a grace motivated perspective has had on my life. I still use them constantly as a compass to keep me on course for what I am to be about as a Christian wife, mother, and homemaker. I have listened to these teachings so many times I can predict when a baby is going to fuss in the congregation. I am a devoted reader of the Girl Talk blog, and I love the fact that this faithful mother has lived what she has taught, and the evidence can be read almost daily through the wisdom her daughters inherited from her. This isn’t an exercise in praising man. It is an expression of my gratitude to God for the means of grace He has provided me and countless others through the ministry of one couple devoted to His purposes and His glory. And also if you've never been blessed to read, or listen to teaching by the Mahaneys, allow me to introduce you. Any of the links will bring you to the resources that have impacted my life and the lives of many others. By the way, Jason got the idea of sending me to Panera Bread every Monday from…the Mahaneys, of course!

Maggie's Cup

2006-04-28T08:13:00.000-07:00

I have a confession to make. This is the first time in our lives that our boys have played a competitive organized sport. Don't get me wrong - competitive sports are a way of life around here, but the whole Parks & Rec. thing I have put off until now. I have another confession to make. I love watching my boys play on their little baseball team. Almost equally, I love watching Jason help the boys learn to be godly atheletes. He is having so much fun! All three are on the same team which is a great conversation starter (and ender) with the other moms. "Which one is yours?" "Number 8, number 9, and number 10." "Oh my! How old are they?" "The twins are 8, Israel's 7." "You must have your hands full." "Yeah, but it works out great for organized sports." Actually, I am enjoying the opportunity to connect with ladies outside of the church. I anticipate it being an evangelistic opportunity. I'm really praying God will continue to open doors for the gospel. Well, everyone came to the boys first scrimmage game. My mother, Jason's parents, my sister and her kids...we had a whole cheering section! Somehow afterwards we had a conversation about athletic cups. My mom was saying that when she went to my cousins little league game the week before, it was mandatory that the boys wore protective cups. She said all you could see from the bleachers were these enormous cups on these little kids. Her and my aunt got a real kick out of it. Then Jimmy said something about being traumatized by his first athletic cup experience...he went with my mother (enough said). Anyway, back in the van the boys asked what a cup was so we told them. Maggie pipes up and says, "I had one of those before!" We laughed and laughed. She said defensively, "at the doctors!" Apparently, she had to pee in a cup one time and thought that's what we were talking about. Well, the adventure continues. We are loving baseball.

We're Together For The Gospel Too

2006-04-27T05:56:00.000-07:00

My husband is privileged to be at the Together for the Gospel Conference. I am following along as often as I can through Tim Challies' live-blogging. One thing I noticed in his account of Mark Dever’s opening comments are the references to the things the leaders of this conference are not together on. It’s funny. Here’s an exerpt:

Dever explained that these men are not together on what to wear, on what pulpit to use or on what songs to sing or on what music to play. Mark suggested that if any Sovereign Grace guys are present, they be given access to the aisle seat so they can move around a little bit. They are not together on applause or on "amen's." The Sovereign Grace folk will surely be vocal in letting you know their agreement, Baptists will mumble a polite "amen," whereas Presbyterians believe that silence is consent. Neither are they together on how to introduce the speakers. Mark encouraged us to make a game of this and during the week keep track of all things that these men are not together on. "Together for the ___________ [fill in the blank]."

But isn’t it amazing that there is one unifying truth that these pastors are together on: the truth of the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ. This conference glorifies God in its diversity, but even more in its unity. How exciting to know that there are so many pastors gathered declaring with one accord: we are Together For The Gospel. Wonderful! I’m not in Kentucky. I’m here in my little house with four little children, but we are also together for the Gospel. We aren’t together on homeschooling (the boys don’t always find it as necessary as Mommy does), but we are together for the Gospel and homeschooling provides all sorts of reminders and applications of our need for a Savior! We aren’t together on how to have a good time (the boys preferring sports, Maggie preferring tea party, Mommy preferring reading), but we are together for the Gospel and because the Gospel tells us that Jesus laid down His life for us, we are able to lay down our lives for each other during play time. We aren’t together on the housework that needs to be done (though they seem to be together about un-doing it), but we are together for the Gospel, and Jesus who did not come to be served, but to serve makes it possible for us to do the same. My prayer is that today I would remember that all “differences” we encounter today are to bring us together for the Gospel. I don’t want to miss the opportunities to enjoy and apply the Gospel as a family: Daddy in Kentucky, and the rest of in the kitchen.

Wish I Had a Picture

2006-04-24T07:12:00.000-07:00

We are a bit of a spectacle under the normalest of circumstances, so imagine how this must have looked to outside observers. A family of six arrives at their condo around 9 pm with much to get from the minivan to the room on the eighth floor where they will stay for the week. Not only are there suitcases, backpacks, blankies, and the like; there are multitudes of little white bags laden with the week's groceries purchased from the Food Lion across the street. Somehow, there are no available luggage carts. The kids are excited and tired (a rather dangerous combination), but enthusiastically offer to help mom and dad carry stuff from van to elevator. Everybody is wearing backpacks and carrying at least two grocery bags. I wow my husband with my ability to carry more bags than he imagined possible (don't all mothers learn that trick?), and even little Maggie is loaded up. I can only imagine what this looked like to our co-vacationers: A moving mass of bodies, blue bags, suitcases, and backpacks all racing to get to the elevator and be the first one to push the button (huge novelty for kids, apparently). So we finally get to the elevator, push the button, load in - I should say wedged in. We push 8. It doesn't light up. The door opens and the same group of people we left gawking in the lobby are staring at us. The door closes. We push 8 again. It doesn't light up. The door opens. We are officially the latest freak show attraction at the Carousel. A brave man joins our family. He pushes 7. It lights up. We move up to the seventh floor with much relief. He leaves. We push 8. It doesn't light up. We push 9. Yes, it seems that every floor is accessible via elevator except for the 8th floor. My kids are groaning under the weight of their bags and backpacks (but hey - at least everybody had a chance to push the button). We have no choice. We have to take the stairs. The kids were excited at first, but when we opened the door to the dark cement staircase they were a bit freaked out. What else could we do. We all carried all of our stuff down the steps. Jason and I, laughed so hard. This is so typically Reyes! Anyway, it made for a great memory. Not just for us, but all of the entertained guests in the lobby.

Vacation Photos

2006-04-19T12:49:00.000-07:00

Playing "Tag" with ocean swells Swimming in the indoor pool Riding in style on the Ocean City Boardwalk Racing go-carts for the first time Ice skating at the rink located right in our condominium Beholding the glory of God through creation

Beautiful Everyday Life

2006-04-18T13:26:00.000-07:00

I had a wonderful vacation. I will be sure to post a few memories and pictures - some planned, others totally unexpected making them all the more memorable. Even though we came home Friday, we spent Saturday and Sunday with family both catching up (my Mom was gone before me, and it had been almost two weeks since I had seen her)and celebrating Resurrection Day. Monday was spent out of the house running errands, so normal life was delayed....until today. I went to bed last night with dirty dishes in my sink, every room with at least three things out of order - some rooms with only three things left in order. To be honest, I was a bit overwhelmed. In addition to the housework, I had homeschooling hanging over my head. We took the first two weeks of the quarter off (one for standardized testing; one for vacation), so even though I planned for it, I feel the lag in momentum. God is so patient and gracious. I went to bed in unconfessed even undetected unbelief. God could have ended my life while I slept because of my sinful pride, but instead He woke me in the morning and encouraged me with the words of David and Solomon. From Psalm 28:7 The Lord is my strength and my shield; in Him my heart trusts, and I am helped; my heart exults, and with my song I give thanks to Him. From Ecc. 5:18 Behold what I have seen to be good and fitting is to eat and drink and find enjoyment in all the toil with which one toils under the sun the few days of his life that God has given him, for this is his lot. God gave me strength and help to not just get back into normal life today, but to truly find enjoyment in the "toil" God has given me. I am overwhelmed by His mercy toward me. Vacation is great. It is a blessing provided by God. But I have to say, I love my beautiful everyday life even more! So glad to be back.

Making Memories

2006-04-08T04:10:00.000-07:00

I am blessed to have parents who made memory-making a priority in our lives. I have so many fond memories of various vacations, holidays, beloved family rituals, and isolated special events from childhood on up. My husband has a similar history. This convinces us to do the same for our children. I am also blessed to have the Mahaneys' example of intentionality with regards to...well, to just about anything. From sports and the first day of Spring to Sunday morning and significant birthdays, this family is serious about investing both fun and faith into their family. We are going on vacation this week. Kind, generous friends of ours are allowing us to stay in their condo at Ocean City, MD. By God's grace we hope to follow the example of our parents, and the Mahaneys and make the most of this unique opportunity. If you think of it, would you pray that we would be able to carry out our simple plans to bless our children this week.

Abby's Testimony

2006-04-06T04:38:00.000-07:00

What a privilege it is to have a sister in law who is not only one of my closest friends, but is also part of my growth group for the leader's wives at Chesapeake. I can honestly say that the following testimony oozes with the humility that is truly characteristic of Abby's life. Enjoy! And be inspired!

Having Faith in My Faithful God Before I get into my testimony, I want to say that my desire tonight is to tell you about how the Lord has made Himself greater in my eyes, and how He has given me a new understanding of His grace and love that I have never experienced so deep or recognized up until this point in my life. This testimony is truly about my God and His heart for His children. Here’s just a glimpse into my life and a taste of how He has shown Himself strong to me. Here goes… Looking back on my life, I can see how such a big sin area for me has always been laziness and my own desire for comfort. As a result, a desire for sleep became stronger and eventually an idol in my life. I wanted it too much and many times sacrificed my personal time with the Lord in order to have more of it. In my blind pride, I did not see the seriousness of this sin of selfishness and I had little to no desire to change or give up my comforts. Once I had children, this area was slightly shaken up a bit only because of their sleeping schedules and need for my attention, but I still fought having to give up my own comfort and slowly my quiet time became inconsistent or squeezed in when there was time for it. Not having a set time or a plan to meet with Him was not helping me to grow in my love for the Savior. Also, I was becoming very self-sufficient and was trying to live the Christian life without God’s grace as my means to obey. Let me just say that it was not fun and I was constantly failing and feeling condemned. It is a horrible way to live and it is not what God wanted for me. Well, back in January, Jimmy and I went to the Marriage Retreat held in Hershey, PA. When we arrived, I was feeling very self-focused and wished that this time away could just be for Jimmy and me to be together and have a vacation. Well, that was not what God had in mind. He was beginning to convict me for my hard heart and lack of desire to join in with the spiritual aspects of our time away. In my pride and arrogance, I kept fighting the conviction of the Holy Spirit because I did not want to change or admit that I really needed to repent and ask the Lord for grace and help. But praise God that even when we run from Him He does not let us go too far before He reaches out and gently brings us back to Himself. Jimmy graciously began to draw me out and ask me hard questions to try to help me see my need for change. The Holy Spirit began to convict me and show me that by neglecting spending time with the Lord on a daily basis I was becoming dull to spiritual things and taking on a very worldly mindset. Even though I began to see this clearly, I was still resisting the idea of changing. I was coming up with one excuse after another and wanting to be excused from having to wake up early. I would think things like, “My children are so young, it’s not really realistic to get up so early and have a quiet time…truly God must understand. It’s just this season I’m in.” Well, I left the conference aware of the Lord’s work, but not yet willing to obey in this area of my life. You see, Jack, my almost 3 year old, for about a year has been waking on an average of 4 times a week as early as 5:45. What would happen is he would come into my room and wake me up. Although not outwardly visible, inwardly my heart was very angry. It was such a shame that God was using my son to try to help me to “GET UP!” and I was so proud that I was blind to it. I would even share with my growth group and ask them for input, but all I would ask them for was how I could get Jack to sleep longer. Thankfully, God kept pursuing me. One night at my growth group, Daryl had one of Carolyn Mahaney’s blogs printed up for us to read. It was entitled, “The 5:00 Club”. That title definitely scared me, but I wanted to hear what it was about. Basically what the blog boiled down to was that Carolyn and her 3 daughters wake up at 5:00 each morning (or earlier) and will call one another to hold each other accountable. In our group, we were kind of laughing and joking about the thought of waking up that early, but at the same time, God began to stir in my heart faith for change. All of a sudden the Holy Spirit opened my eyes and I saw so clearly that the solution to my change was to wake up before Jack and spend time alone with the Lord. It was almost like I needed to know that other people in the world actually did this and that it was possible by God’s grace. Laurie told me that she wakes up at 5:30 and that she would call me if I wanted her to. I was so grateful that Daryl brought that blog and wanted to motivate us to press in to all that God has for us in this area. That was 2 months ago, yesterday, and by God’s grace, I have been getting up each morning and spending time with the Lord, reading His Word and praying. Let me just say that my life has been changed ever since. I have experienced God’s grace in a way that I never thought I could. By the power of the Holy Spirit, I have been able to say no to sin, and He has given me faith for change in my life. He has used His Word to convict and encourage me each day and I believe that my heart is softer than ever and I am more in tune to His Spirit in my life. By His grace, I will never go back to letting a day go by without spending time with my Lord. Not because I want to “earn” favor from God, but because I need Him so much and recognize that only He is truly my sufficiency and my joy. So my heart for each of you is that you will be willing to obey God in whatever way He is calling you to. It may not mean getting up at 5:30, but it might mean making small sacrifices in your life in order to make Him your passion and priority. Do not fear letting go of an area in your life that you’ve been holding on to, but take that step of faith and believe that God is ready and willing to turn your world upside down in an amazing way.

May we all be encouraged to humble ourselves before God and believe that He has grace to do what is absolutely impossible in our own flesh. Thanks girly, for your wonderful example!

Sweet Painful Reminder

2006-04-05T12:42:00.000-07:00

To my shame there are days when I have thought to myself, "I can't do this mom thing all day another day." This isn't because my children are particularly difficult. This isn't because I have any ailment or disease. I'm not living under the pressure of single parenthood, or having to endure the hardship of working outside the home. No. The only reason my life is difficult for me to embrace with joy and gratitude at times is the simple fact that I am a selfish woman. I am the reason my life feels hard at times. How un-Christlike I have discovered I am. With so many opportunities to humbly lay down my life and serve these precious treasures, my children; I choose to complain, and even at times resent the constant demands of motherhood. I want to escape. Joni Erickson Tada shuts my mouth. I was freshly humbled as I read her testimony on the girltalk blog today. My life is so pain-free, trial-free. How can I read about Joni's humble dependence on God for strength in the midst of a real trial and not be convicted and inspired? God, help me to be humble and realize how pleasant the lines have fallen to me. Forgive me for complaining. Help me to realize that I am so weak, I even strain under the little weight motherhood brings. You are Joni's strength and her smile. Please be my strength and my smile.

Psalm 27:4

2006-04-04T16:50:00.001-07:00

Psalm 27:4 "One thing have I desired of the Lord, that will I seek after; that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the Lord, and to enquire in His temple." One supreme desire occupies the believing heart. He longs for close communion with the Lord. He diligently uses all appointed means. He seeks the ordinances which God's presence sanctifies. Such is the constant habit of his soul. It is no passing impulse. He pursues this hallowed communion all the days of his life. His eyes would see the beauty of the Lord, the lovely charm of His transcendent grace, displayed in redemption's wondrous work. His soul thirsts after fuller knowledge. His ardent cry is, "Show me Your glory." -Henry Law

When Things Don't Go Topsy Turvy, But Should

2006-04-01T14:56:00.000-08:00

It began with me seeing a picture of a madhatter cake (also called a topsy turvy cake), and finding directions online. I have been experimenting with fondant covered cakes lately, since they're so trendy right now, and decided to try a single tier mad hatter cake for a baby shower. Fortunately, I started early enough that if it didn't work, I would have plenty of time to make another more standard cake. Well, it began fine, but by the time I put the first layer of fondant over the whole thing, it just kind of looked like a really tall warped cake covered with a large piece of cheese. Not exactly what I was picturing for Kate's shower. So I froze the cake thinking that I'd use it for Jason's birthday, and made the second cake for the shower. Then I had a bright idea. I would look online to see if I could find directions for making a cowboy hat shaped cake. Believe it or not, I found directions. I had to modify them because my hat was huge, but it helped me as a guideline. Even though it took a while, I still can't believe how smoothly this went compared to the other cake. This is a lesson in not overestimating my abilities in the world of cakes. But, on the other hand, God really blessed me with making something cuter than I thought I was capable of. There must be a profound life lesson in there somewhere. I'm too tired to think about it right now. I'm still recuperating from that party! And here's the finished product. I wish I had a picture of it while it still looked like a tall, warped cake covered in cheese.

Murder on the Prairie

2006-03-31T04:14:00.000-08:00

What do you get when you take Reyeses, Cannons, and a few good friends, a murder mystery, dinner, and Jason's birthday? A crazy fun time! Last Sunday our families along with Brian and Tracie Young gathered together to solve the mystery of Murder on the Prairie. It was a game I bought online where each person comes as a character in the story (11 suspects, 3 witnesses) and during three courses of dinner must reveal a list of clues(while in character)then attempt to predict "who dunnit" at the end. Here are a few pictures: My sister provided the prairie atmosphere. Here are the suspects and witnesses busy at work/play. This is Brian (prairie barber)and Tracie Young (victim's wife), our dear friends of many years. Longtime buddies My brother Jimmy (young farm hand in love with victim's daughter)and Abby (victim's daughter) Chris (sheriff) and Emily (Jason's sister and...prairie can-can girl) My Brother-in-law Dan (scary gunslinger who played his part too well! and my neice-his daughter- Sierra, my right hand gal)Dan was also the photographer for the evening. My parents Jim and Daryl Cannon(prairie store owners) Laurie (me) and Jason (birthday boy and farm hand). I couldn't have done this without my 13 year old neice and helper, Sierra. She helped with the cooking, serving, and even took some photos! Jason's parents and grandmother: Tom (farmer), Debbie (teacher), and Granny (can-can girl, and great sport!) Me and my sister, Karyn (indian maid)who was a huge help in decorating, setting up, and cleaning up. Isn't she gorgeous?! crazy cowboy hat cake (a whole post could be devoted to the history of this cake and how it came to be) Birthday boy blows out his candles. I won't say who the murderer was because we are thinking about hosting it again, maybe with our caregroup leaders?

Victorious Loser

2006-03-27T09:07:00.000-08:00

I have good news and bad news. Bad news first: none of my teams are left in the College Basketball bracket. Good news: Neither are Jason's; and I had more right predictions for victory than he did which makes me the victorious loser (five of my elite eight picks made it). Even Better News: We have bonded in a new way through this basketball madness. Even though I generally fall asleep before it's over (only to discover on 3 separate occasions that my teams beat his in overtime or dramatically at the last second), I still know whose playing when and so on and so forth. Way more interest than my usual, "You have got to be kidding me...another basketball game??!!" I even know things like "sweet sixteen", "elite eight", and "final four". Best News of All: I get an hour long massage. Sweet victory!

Because Dad Says It So Much Better...

2006-03-25T10:28:00.000-08:00

My Dad left a comment on my last post that I found so edifying, I'm posting it. It was actually through a series on the Sovereignty of God that my Dad taught years ago that I heard for the first time that grace does not equal easy. My Dad is the author of that phrase, not me. He expounds on it by saying

I realized that the older a man gets the greater the temptation to shift his ambition to seeking his own comfort and ease above all else. What a tragic way to end one's life - seeking one's comfort rather than God's glory. What a tragic epitath to one's life: "He lived by God's grace for his comfort," rather than "He lived By God's grace for God's glory." May all of who call upon the name of the Lord not be entangled by the "Grace = Easy" snare and finish with Paul's words on our lips: "2 Tim. 4:7-8 (ESV) I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. [8] Henceforth there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous judge, will award to me on that Day, and not only to me but also to all who have loved his appearing."

We may not be older men...ever...but still, is it not true that even as moms we face daily temptation to desire comfort and ease, rather than glorify God through the hard work He has called us to? Thanks Dad. Your voice comes through in so many of my "spiritual" posts. You have been a faithful teacher of God's Word not just in the pulpit, but in ordinary life as well. I love you

Grace = Easy?

2006-03-24T10:31:00.000-08:00

When one of my boys was in kindergarten he was having trouble with a Math concept. After working for a while we were both frustrated, so I finally remembered to pray and ask God for help. We continued to work on the concept, and after a few minutes my son says, "Maybe God isn't helping me because He's resting right now." I answered him, "Sometimes the way God helps us is to help us work harder." I need to take my own counsel. Somehow I think that grace means my life will feel easy. Sometimes this does happen. I mount with wings as eagles. I run and do not grow weary. But there are times when grace comes in the form of obstacles, perseverence, and really hard work...that I feel every bit of. This week is one of those weeks. I have so much to do, and God poured out grace upon grace - but I am exhausted and tempted to think that today - God must be resting. The "gas tank" of energy is empty, and I am hoping for those magical wings to pick me up off of this chair and get me into the kitchen to clean! No, God isn't resting. In His sovereign activity in my life He decided that grace would look like, and feel like hard work this week. May I say with Paul, "it is God who works in me, both to will and to work for His good pleasure.(Phil 2 :13) and that I am "...struggling with all His energy that he powerfully works within me." (Col 1:29) God, please give me the grace to have the will and the capacity to work for your good pleasure. As I struggle through this day, help me to do so with your energy that powerfully works within me.

Great Talk from the Girls

2006-03-23T08:49:00.000-08:00

If you haven't done it yet, please read Nicole Whitacre's post on God being our burden bearer. Here's a little sample to whet your appetite:

What is your burden today? They come in countless shapes and sizes—from clingy colds to crushing cares. But one thing’s for sure: our idols cannot bear their load. Leisure and escape don’t provide true rest. Sinful anger cannot relieve the pressure. Even friends are not strong enough to bear up under their full weight.

How often I look to leisure, escape, and anger - such futility! I am grateful for Nicole's reminder to turn the unfathomable strength and the faithfulness of our Father to bear our burdens.

“Blessed be the Lord, who daily bears us up; God is our salvation. Selah." (Psalm 68:19)

Your Goodness Passes Before Me

2006-03-22T07:18:00.000-08:00

I read the familiar passage in Exodus this morning where Moses asks God to show him His glory.

18 Moses said, “Please show me your glory.” 19 And he said, “I will make all my goodness pass before you and will proclaim before you my name ‘The Lord.’ And I will be gracious to whom I will be gracious, and will show mercy on whom I will show mercy. 20 But,” he said, “you cannot see my face, for man shall not see me and live.” 21 And the Lord said, “Behold, there is a place by me where you shall stand on the rock, 22 and while my glory passes by I will put you in a cleft of the rock, and I will cover you with my hand until I have passed by. 23 Then I will take away my hand, and you shall see my back, but my face shall not be seen.”

I have often read this and envied Moses. I have prayed, "O God, show me Your glory. Let Your goodness pass before my eyes." God answered my prayer powerfully today. Also in my Bible reading today was John 12 when Jesus goes to Jerusalem (His triumphal entry) and people are saying Hosanna! While I'm reading this I realize that I am watching the Goodness of God pass before my eyes. I saw the good plan unfolding as Jesus, the glorious One, is getting ready for the hour of His crucifixion. I saw the Good One - the perfect One marching on toward Calvary. I hide in the Rock of Ages cleft for me today. I behold what Moses could not: the culmination of the goodness of God expressed in the death of His Perfect Son in order to save a rebellious people for His glory, and then make them objects of His mercy and grace over and over and over again.

Spring Cleaning

2006-03-20T12:43:00.000-08:00

I was curious to know if any of you actually do "spring cleaning". If you do, why do you do it? How do you do it(what does it consist of)? What is your strategy?

If You Can't Beat Them, Join Them...And Then Beat Them

2006-03-17T04:21:00.000-08:00

March Madness. It has been a seasonal guest in our home since we were married. The men in my family don't really get into basketball, so I never knew such a thing as March Madness existed until that first March when I learned that I would, indeed, have no control over the remote for an entire month every year of our married lives. I never knew much about March Madness except that it meant tons of college basketball games that would eventually lead to a final 4, final 2, and finally the winner. This year will be different. I decided that this year I would join Jason in the madness. We filled out tournament brackets over dinner at Red Brick Station. He enjoyed explaining to me what the little numbers meant next to the teams. I picked my teams with a little combination of statistics, loyalty, and heart. It took me five minutes. Well, guess what? Thanks to my loyalty to Dad's many alma maters I chose well. Texas A&M, LSU, and George Washington University all won. A special thanks to my Tennessee connection. And another thanks for whoever named a school Gonzaga (chosen for how it sounds). So far I am beating Jason's picks: he chose 9 winning teams. I chose 12.

My Loaves and Fish? or Bread of Life?

2006-03-16T04:23:00.000-08:00

I read about Jesus feeding the 5000 in John 6 this morning. Many times when I read this I make the application is as follows: I have five little loaves and two little fish of my gift, ability, etc. and Jesus, who is all-powerful, can take my little offering of myself, and increase it to feed 5000! Such application gives faith that where I am lacking, Jesus can increase. This morning, however, the Holy Sprit gave me eyes to see things differently. I have no loaves or fish. I have an empty stomach. Jesus is the bread, not my abilities. His body had to be broken on my behalf. Is it possible that the whole reason humans need to eat, and not just eat - but eat things that once had life, but had to die to feed us (meat, vegetables, grains)- is to show us a greater truth in the spiritual realm? Our souls need food or we will die. Jesus saying we must partake of Him, or we will die is hard to understand. I think it has something to do with Jesus, like food, having to be broken and killed so that I might live. I think it means something about Jesus being the only thing that satisfies my hungry soul. I believe it means that viewing manna as my daily Bible reading doesn't go far enough if I remember Jesus said He is manna- Bread come down from heaven. It's not just reading the Bible as an ends in itself, but it means reading it as a means of intimate communion with Jesus. And it means that when Isaiah asks the question: Why do you spend your money for that which is not bread, and your wages for that which does not satisfy? God is inviting me to turn aside from the poisonous lite fare of this world (comfort, entertainment, praise from man)that never satisfies but leaves me craving more; and turn to the Bread of Life and find my soul deeply satisfied, nourished, alive and thriving...and craving more.

Happy Birthday, Handsome!

2006-03-15T05:04:00.000-08:00

Today is Jason's Birthday. I thought and thought about how to honor this man who means more to me than any human alive, and my words fall short. I have always loved this poem because it expresses a bit of what I feel about my husband. My best daydreams about "the one" from my single years fell woefully short of what God in His mercy and grace has given me in Jason. XXVI. "I lived with visions for my company..." by Elizabeth Barrett Browning I lived with visions for my company Instead of men and women, years ago, And found them gentle mates, nor thought to know A sweeter music than they played to me. But soon their trailing purple was not free Of this world's dust, their lutes did silent grow, And I myself grew faint and blind below Their vanishing eyes. Then thou didst come---to be, Belovèd, what they seemed. Their shining fronts, Their songs, their splendours (better, yet the same, As river-water hallowed into fonts), Met in thee, and from out thee overcame My soul with satisfaction of all wants: Because God's gifts put man's best dreams to shame.

My Beloved Oxen

2006-03-14T04:49:00.000-08:00

Jason is having the boys read through Proverbs right now, and this morning he highlighted the following for he and I to remember.

Proverbs 14:4 Where there are no oxen, the manger is clean, but abundant crops come by the strength of the ox.

Here's my paraphrase (to be remembered when I find myself craving order and ease):

Where there are no little children, there are no legos to step on, toilets to wipe down daily, forts to navigate around, food, food, and more food to clean up after; but these children are the means of fruit being born in my life, and more importantly they will one day be the strength that brings in a harvest for the glory of God.

I love my oxen!

Is It A Small World After All?

2006-03-11T14:29:00.000-08:00

I am sitting in the room where I live 80% of my normal day. I teach in this room, eat in this room, prepare meals in the adjoining kitchen, clean those meals in that kitchen. It is a wonderful room. I love my kitchen, with it's attempt at 1950's charm in a 21st century home. I love my homeschool/dinindg/family room. It has a double window, my dining room table (a cherished antique passed down from my mother-in-law), and my gas fire place. These rooms, which are not divided by a wall, are my favorite rooms of the house to be sure. But, there are times when my little world can feel very, very small. One home to maintain, one husband to help, and four little children to serve is wonderful, and consuming. Yes, I have my life with people in the church, and I have occasion to be with unbelievers periodically, but truly, my world is small. There are two potential dangers I have in my tiny world. One is to become frustrated with the boundaries and try to make them bigger. I grow discontent with the little life I am leading, so I add to it. I broaden it. I take on tasks that make my world feel bigger. Often these are good things. But when it comes down to it, I can't manage my little world well when I add too much to it in this season. If my domain here at home suffers, then I have tried to make my world too big. And if my efforts are motivated by craving significance and importance; appreciation or praise from men, then really I think it's more like I made my world too small. So small it included only me and my feelings of worth and value. The other danger is that I can get so caught up in my own little world, that I forget there is a whole planet out there with things happening that are important to be aware of. I know that I am to focus on my family, making them the primary beneficiaries of my energy and effort, but I must still keep an outward focus and understand things bigger than myself and my season. I get so caught up in my season, that I find it less natural to talk to women in other seasons and experiences. Why is this? Did my children kill certain social brain cells? I have no problem talking for hours on end about potty training, homeschool curricula, home management technique, infant care, pregnancy - but remove those common experiences and sometimes more effort is required. This isn't bad, that more effort is required, as long as I'm making that effort...and that is the key. God addressed both of my problems with regard to my world this week. Carolyn Mahaney's teaching "Busy At Home" from her Titus 2 series addressed the issue of resisting my boundaries. She reminded me that I can either resent the boundaries set before me in this season, or I can enjoy all of the blessing within the boundary lines marked out for me. I listen to this teaching when I feel off-course, discontent, or like my world is too small (several times each year!). God used two posts to help me with the problem of being too focused on my little world, to the exclusion of others either in various seasons, or even in various cultures. Carolyn McCulley, (who by the way, you must make part of your blog reading - she wrote two insightful articles recently about anxiety, and what we feel verses what is real) wrote last week about an issue that I would never have known about in my tiny world here in Abingdon, MD. The issue is that of female circumcision which happens most commonly in Africa. I never want to be insulated from the trials of the world at large. I am grateful for Carolyn who consistently keeps her readers informed about matters such as these. The other post was that of my friend Libby Turek who being motivated by memories of older girls who invested in her life when she was a teenager, decided to do the same and had a 13 year old girl spend the night with her while her husband was away. What a great reminder for me to remember the young ladies around me...not just the young moms who are so near to my heart, but the young single ladies, the teenagers, and even the pre-teens. I was so inspired by Libby's example. God, help me to rejoice in the boundaries you have placed in my life. Thank You that they are pleasant. Help me not to make them bigger than You have ordained and in so doing, shrink my world of influence to only me. But help me also not to become insulated from the people around me. Let me see others near and far. Even if my work on their behalf is prayer alone, help me to be faithful to do it do it.

In Honor of a Stranger

2006-03-11T07:48:00.000-08:00

Virginia Lee Green Born June 27, 1934 Died Tuesday, March 7, 2006 I never met Virginia Green. And though this is true, I am profoundly grateful for the impact of her life on mine. At the risk of over-using the familiar metaphor, one ripple resulting from the pebble named Virginia Green dropping into the pond of Baltimore, Maryland has touched my life. That ripple is my good friend Karen Hevesy. Her mom, Mrs. Green, left this earth last week, not as a result of the cancer she was diagnosed with, but due to complications that her weakened body was unable to recover from. Jim, Karen's husband is our church administrator, so we enjoy not only a ministry-relationship, but a friendship as well - cultivated through care group, retreats, and hangin' out. I am sure I speak on behalf of the rest of the staff and their wives when I say that our team is very blessed to have the Hevesys. They bring something unique to the group...an amazing sense of humor. Jim is often Karen's straight man. It's Karen who keeps us in stitches. We can't get through a caregroup without sore sides from laughing at Karen's antics. Our favorite form of humor is her stories. Karen views life from a different angle. She can find humor in anything: a little boy in a brown polyester leisure suit, pool problems, her husband's injuries, Christmas parties (one is blogged about, the other stays amongst the staff). You name it, Karen has a funny story about it. This truly is a ministry. Karen helps us not take ourselves too seriously, and in the midst of certain aspects of ministry - this is very helpful! Even though Karen is funny, she knows when to be serious. Many times in accountability I, or someone else, will be sharing about an area, trying to get clarity, and Karen will just say one or two sentences that are so prophetic and laser accurate, it's amazing. She is funny, but she is also wise. Her humor is the result of being an acute observer of life which can also result in much wisdom. I don't know how much of Karen's personality, gifts, and graces come from Mrs. Green, but I know from Karen that humor was a part of their family culture. I am grateful for this lady I have never met because her impact on her youngest daughter in some way has enriched my life. Thank you, Karen, also for the example you have been in laying down your life for another. You have honored your mother by serving tirelessly these last months, and you have done it with joy. I am grateful for you, friend. Please know I am praying. If you have any connection with Karen through her blog you can leave condolences there or here and I'll be sure to get them to her. To those of you from Chesapeake, thank you for overwhelming the Hevesys with your prayers and support. Please keep praying.

Bloody Victory

2006-03-08T10:41:00.000-08:00

I am one of those peevish gals who faints at the sight of blood. I can't help it. My body just does it involuntarily. I remember once I was supposed to bring our dog "Puppy" (aren't we creative?) to her follow up vet visit after she was spayed. I was twenty or so years old. Well, all I remember is the doctor pushing on her incision, a spurt of something, and being told to sit down with my head between my knees. Another memorable fainting moment was when my sister, who was newly pregnant, called in hysterics because she was bleeding everywhere. I thought, "pull yourself together, she must be miscarrying." When I walked in the door, she had a blood soaked towel up to her chin. Her dog, a Chow, had bitten her. I started getting woosy. Karyn said with a bit of disgust, "oh great, an emergency situation, and you're the only one available. Sit on my step and put your head between your knees!" I did manage to get Karyn to the hospital...eventually. Well, yesterday, a miracle happened. I did not faint at the sight of blood. Let me back up. You know, mothers of sons especially, how you hear things in the next room that clue you in to the fact that you need to intervene right away. Like when Izzy says to Josh, "tell me if this hurts..." I run in and yell, "whatever you're getting ready to do - don't do it!" Then there are various crashes, cries, etc. Well yesterday, I was sitting here at my computer reading the Girl Talk blog when I heard bang. I waited to hear if there was a subsequent cry. Instead of "ouch" I hear Caleb wailing, "I don't want to go to the hospital!!!! It doesn't really hurt!!!" That is the one sentence following a crash that I don't like hearing. I ran downstairs to find Caleb holding his head with blood going everywhere (I'm nauseated just typing it). Poor guy had piled up pillows and cushions at the bottom of the steps and jumped with a little too much gusto from the landing and hit his head on the bulkhead above. There is a crack and a dent in the wall to attest to the force of the hit. Now I have seen my share of blood having three boys about the same age. We have been stapled, glued, and butterflied as much as the next boy family. But I have to say, I have never...even in the busted lip toddler phase, seen as much blood as yesterday. As much as it bled, it really wasn't too bad. Just the way head/face things go, I suppose. I felt God's grace. I was able to calm him down, clean him up, and call Jason, who was very impressed that I hadn't fainted. We took him to the hospital and he got a few staples - really amazing how they do that. Caleb is fine. I'm still recuperating. Post Script: Izzy was racing Josh about an hour ago. He hit his toe on our metal frame hamper. He is still hopping around on one foot, and insists that he can't walk on his hurt foot. I don't think there is much you can do with a broken pinky toe, but what if he broke the little bone below the toe? Am I headed to the emergency room again?! These boys are committed to aging me prematurely.

Bearded Lady

2006-03-06T16:08:00.000-08:00

The women in my family love to laugh at ourselves...and each other. We each provide a different venue for laughs. My mother, the leader of the "laugh-at-yourself" club, is known for her odd pronunciations of various words. For example, she reads a poim, not a poem. She takes Pepto Bismo for an upset stomach. And she slips back into her New Orleans accent when she visits Grandma like she's Sybil or something. There is an entire series of stories co-starring my Aunt Fran. I don't have time or permission to tell those! My sister entertains by her huge reactions to, well, to just about anything. Every gift she opens is the most amazing thing she's ever seen. Any news we have regarding the children is definite evidence that they are geniuses. If there is good news, she is the absolute best person to tell...complete with very loud exclamations of excitement. If you get your hair done differently, she will absolutely loooooove it! She has simply ruined me for normal reactions from others. Humor from my life seems to always center around my physical appearance. We can hardly look at the family photos without a reminder of just how "funny-looking" I was in my awkward phase, which for the record, lasted a good 18 years. Apparently in the 70's they didn't really make many children's frames (so my mom claims) and that explains why I have glasses that are dark brown and cover half of my face. I also had what I was told was a "Dorothy Hammel" haircut, which resulted in people always asking my sister what her little brother's name was. The other day Abby, Karyn, and I had another hearty laugh over my physical appearance. This was in reference to a shocking post-partum discovery. It wasn't enough that after I delivered 14 pounds of baby, the other 36 pounds I gained miraculously moved to my thighs, rear end, and my nose (yes, at least two pounds went straight to my nose). I mean, surely it was all baby before they came out! And apparently, it wasn't enough that my belly was a warped floppy mess-literally two handfuls of skin (I know, too much information). It also wasn't enough that I had to continue to wear the three maternity dresses I grew to loathe well after I delivered the boys. These things were hard yes, but nothing could prepare me for the grand-daddy of all post-delivery humiliations. I was taking an unusual opportunity to look at my face carefully in the mirror when I noticed it. I said out loud, "Oh. My. Gosh." I had a beard. I kid you not...I had a real beard. It had probably been there for weeks and I didn't notice because, well, I had more important things to notice like two newborn baby boys. I was already reeling from the adjustment to being a mom (hormones a-ragin'). So let's just say that I didn't at that moment, laugh at my beard discovery. What does one do when one discovers she has a beard? I thought, this must be male hormone from the boys. I thought, why didn't my sister tell me about this? I knew she had to have noticed. And then I did what I thought made perfect sense. I went to Wal Mart and bought a chemical hair remover. I put it all over my beard. Whooooo Nelly! That hurt almost as bad as breast feeding (not quite). I took off the chemicals only to discover that it removed not only the hair, but a layer of skin as well. So in the days following (felt like weeks), I had a scab beard. But hey, at least the hair was gone! We laughed so hard. I love being in a family that doesn't take themselves too seriously. We really love to laugh at ourselves. It is good medicine. And the next time you are lamenting the affects childbearing has had on your body, comfort yourself with this: you probably didn't grow a beard your brother could have envied.

Godly Bloggers

2006-03-06T15:06:00.000-08:00

Sovereign Grace Ministries is truly blessed to have such godly leaders. Two blog posts I read today caused me to stop and thank God for the grace that comes through women and men who are committed to His Word - not just communicating it in a helpful way, but modeling the application of it. If you haven't, be sure to catch Girl Talk today as Carolyn Mahaney tells us a unique approach to mortifying criticism of our spouses in order to grow in encouragement. I have enjoyed reading Joshua Harris' blog lately. He recently posted two meditations (one on discipline for grown ups, one on abiding in Christ) that are excellent. His insights are great, and his writing is engaging, of course.

A Picture Is Worth A Thousand Words

2006-03-03T12:31:00.000-08:00

This is a daily event in our house. We call it "family wrestle". If a picture is worth a thousand words than these pictures may be saying the following. 1. Jason's days of taking on all three boys are numbered. He is regularly getting injured during family wrestle. 2. Maggie could have issues when she grows up. She thinks this is a perfectly normal event for a four-year-old girl. 3. My kids absolutely loooooove their daddy!!!

Bon Voyage, Mom and Dad!

2006-03-02T15:12:00.000-08:00

My mom would like to extend a very warm thanks to the blog community for their prayers on her behalf. She is feeling better, and after two sessions of physical therapy today along with various meds, her doctor thinks she'll be okay to go. My mom had a chance to share with the PT that many people were praying for her. He was surprised at the change in her neck in just 24 hours. Thank you, God. Thank you, friends.

Please Pray for My Mom

2006-03-02T04:21:00.000-08:00

I want to rally as many people as possible to pray for my mom today. My parents have been anticipating a cruise for months now to celebrate their 40th anniversary. They are supposed to leave tomorrow, but may have to cancel because my mom is experiencing severe pain due to muscle spasms in her neck. She is a tough cookie, so if she says it is too bad to go, it must be really bad. She went to her doctor who immediately sent her to a physical therapist and gave her drugs. Thankfully, they have insurance on their cruise tickets so if they can't go, they will receive their money back and reschedule. But, they are both already packed and have been geared up for weeks, so can you pray with me that God will heal my Mom's neck? If you know my parents, they will glorify God in the midst of disappointment. I still hope that God will do the miraculous and heal her. It would be a fitting kick-off to the celebration of their marriage which miraculously has survived forty years in spite of an against-all-odds beginning. I'd love to tell their story sometime. But today, if you would, please pray for my mother.

Looky Here!

2006-03-01T04:36:00.000-08:00

There have been some wonderful posts in the blogosphere lately, and they are found other places than here. Check out a few that I have found very helpful lately. Solofeminity: Carolyn McCulley, in classic McCulley style, brilliantly and wisely informs us how to find contentment, not just as a single woman, but in any season. This is one smart lady, and even better - she is godly and wise. Girl Talk: Well, of course no reference to helpful blogs could be complete without this one! I love Carolyn's post from yesterday. It gives me faith for my future as an empty nester, but also challenges me that how I invest in my marriage will directly affect my future experience in marriage. Worship Matters: Bob Kauflins Monday devotions are a must-read for me. Check this one out about applying the gospel to our lives everyday. I love the Piper quote in particular. Fishboys: Jessica Fisher shares her plans for playdates with the kids in her church. She even set up a blog! I love to be inspired by other moms as to how to love and cherish my children even more. This is a lady who is thriving in her role as mother and it is evident in her posts.

That's Amore!

2006-02-28T05:47:00.000-08:00

When the staff had a marriage retreat last month we agreed that one of the most memorable events was when Arie Mangrum (leading the session on romance) had us tell one another what our "song" was. Each person went around the room sharing; and at some point, Jimmy pulled out his laptop and started to play the free 30 seconds of each song from itunes. Couple after couple was reduced to tears in less than 30 seconds. It truly was precious and one of our cherished memories from that retreat. The other night Jason and I were playing Freeze Dance with the kids when Jason put on our song. It is "I Will Be Here" by Stephen Curtis Chapman. As I listened to the words I started crying, of course. My kids were staring at us slow dancing in the middle of the family room - both crying. Why is it that when we were courting and this was the song Jason would sing to me in the car, I wouldn't cry? Well, I suppose it is because I was listening to it with hopeful anticipation; looking toward the future. Now, I can look back and the words are even more precious because we have lived some of them. We have real pictures to put with various phrases which at one time were simply hypothetical. We have seen God's grace in ten years like we never could have anticipated, or predicted. I can hardly imagine how listening to songs are for my parents who celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary this year (going on a well-deserved cruise this Saturday). They don't just have A song, they have a whole cd my Dad put together for my Mom (how sweet and romantic). He can hardly hum a line of song after song without getting misty eyed. I pray our marriage will look like theirs as it seasons with life in God's grace. Try this: Next date night, try listening to "your song" together. Maybe the song you danced to first. Maybe a song you sang to your spouse on your wedding day, or your spouse sang to you. I have a feeling it will affect your heart much like it did each one of us.

Parenting by Faith or by Fear?

2006-02-27T04:01:00.000-08:00

I know most of you who read this already visit the GirlTalk blog regularly, but I want to draw attention to the following quote by Carolyn Mahaney because I thought it was soooooo helpful.

Faith toward God is the foundation of effective mothering. Did you catch that? Here it is again: Faith toward God is the foundation of effective mothering. Success as a mother doesn’t begin with hard work or sound principles or consistent discipline (as necessary as these are). It begins with God: His character, His faithfulness, His promises, His sovereignty. And as our understanding of these truths increases, so will our faith for mothering. You see, it is relatively easy to implement new practices in parenting. But if our practices (no matter how useful) aren’t motivated by faith, they will be fruitless.

So often I parent by fear rather than faith. It looks like this: Fear motivation: When I notice a sin pattern emerge in one of my children I fear that if I don't get it "under control" now they will be derailed for life. Faith motivation: When I notice a sin pattern emerge in one of my children I am in awe that God would see fit to reveal to me where He is at work in my child's life, and invite me to be an instrument of change on their behalf. Fear: I look at the world around me and fear for my boys because the society is so sexually charged; and fear for my daughter because feminism is everywhere! Faith: I look at the world around me and thank God that He has seen fit to provide outstanding teaching about lust, as well as the roles of biblical manhood and womanhood. By faith I can teach them these things and believe that they will be a light in the darkness. Fear: I panic that my sins against my children will damage them forever. Faith: I believe that God is so amazingly redemptive, that somehow He is able to use even my shortcomings in the lives of my children for His glory. Fear: I read a parenting book and think to myself, "we are all doomed because I will never be able to implement all of this stuff!" Faith: I read a parenting book and think, "yes, I am weak...but He is strong, and His power is perfected in my weakness!" God, as I parent these precious children that you have blessed me with, help me to do so by faith in You, and not by faith in my own abilities. If the success of parenting rested on me, there would be much reason to fear. However, Your character, Your promises, Your sovereignty, and Your faithfulness I have seen over and over in Your Word, in my life, and in the lives of each of my children therefore my heart is at peace and full of joyful anticipation for what You are doing and will do in my family.

Quotable Kiddos: King Size Beds

2006-02-24T06:26:00.000-08:00

Yesterday Joshua informed me that when he grows up he is going to have two king-sized beds in his room. One for him, and one for his wife.

Quotable Kiddos: at play

2006-02-24T06:01:00.000-08:00

Here is the kids' congregation when they played church the other week. The stage from which they preached was the landing between the stairs on the way to the basement. Very cute and ecclectic group, just like Chesapeake. This reminds me of a new thing I'm doing that I'll pass on for your consideration. When the kids spend a lot of time setting something up, I always dread making them clean up their "hard work". Cleaning up is inevitable, however, due to the meetings we host, etc. In effort to honor their creativity and hardwork, even though I was making them put it away, I started taking pictures of their cities, villages, traintracks, battle scenes, tea parties etc. and downloading them into my photo slideshow (which is my screen saver), so now they enjoy them weeks later. Here are a couple of the photos. (Posted because they get a kick out of seeing their stuff on the blog - sounds familiar). I wish I could claim this a kinesthetic homeschool project (I am teaching Maggie to write her name), but she came up with this one herself. This is Caleb's pioneer village.

Shower of Encouragement

2006-02-23T08:26:00.000-08:00

Briana said it best when she called last night a "shower of encouragement" for my sister-in-law, and dear friend, Emily Clancy. She continued the analogy by saying something to the effect that we have baby showers. We have bridal showers (check this one out...too cute!). These are events where we do more than show these gals how much we love them. We actually are equipping them for the major ministries of their lives. We are endowing them with the tools of the trade, so to speak. Some things are used right away. Others are put away until later. Last night, we showered Emily with scripture, evidences of grace, comfort, and inspiration. Emily was diagnosed with MS back in April of 2005. She describes the initial season of diagnosis as one where God just amazingly carried her in a grace that protected her from feeling anxious or fearful or angry. Back in December, she had her first major flare, and said she felt like God put her feet on the ground and said, "walk". It has been a very hard season. Along with the reality of physical discomfort has come the introduction of the treatment with daily injections and minor (thank you God) side-affects. Emily is grateful that she is very functional. You truly wouldn't know anything was wrong to look at her. She is one of the most energetic wives and mothers I know. But with a 3 year old and an almost 1 year old, she has the normal demands and stresses in addition to this disease. I will say as one who has the privilege of walking close to Emily through this, that she is doing amazingly well. Her focus is on God, and she is surrendering daily to the idea that this disease comes from His loving hands. Truly amazing! Heather, her friend of many years, decided to gather Emily's closest friends together to have a time of encouragement and prayer over her. We were asked to bring verses and something to share with Emily. These were our shower gifts and even though they would be "opened" all at once, our prayer is that they will prove useful in the times to come. The night was full of tears, love, and encouragement. This was a precious time. Besides the obvious beauty of seeing the body of Christ at work being His hands, His eyes, His heart for Emily was the fact that God used normal tired moms. It was almost comical to watch each young mom walk in with that all too familiar glazed over look on her face. The hostess, three months pregnant, has cared for her toddler round the clock while her husband worked out of town for four days. Briana, married to a CPA has the challenge of grueling tax season hours, meaning she cares for her toddler twins all day sometimes all night and even on Saturday morning if need be. One girl walked in and told us her two year old was trying to give up his nap...you know how hard that can be if you've ever had a napless two year old. Another girl described her day as a "how many times can mommy sin against the kids?" day. What we all realized, and what I am carrying with me today in my heart, is that in His wisdom and kindness God's plan for a group of young moms who had given and given and given all day, was to come and give one more time to their dear friend, Emily. Rather than be empty, we found ourselves full. Full of encouragement. Full of grace. Try having an encouragement shower sometime. If you have a friend who is going through something hard, rally around her. It was such a blessing for all of us, and I know it will be monument in Emily's heart and mind of the love and care of the Savior through his people... in this case, a group of tired young moms.

Lessons From the Olympics

2006-02-22T03:37:00.000-08:00

I am not an athelete. I can definitely relate to this. Somehow in His divine will, and perhaps sense of humor, God has chosen to make me the wife of a sports fanatic who is discipling my three sons, and yes, my daughter as well, in his love for all things athletic. One of my earnest prayer requests is that I will learn to watch sports, understand them, and even enjoy them someday. As much as I don't understand the fascination with sports, I do find the olympics fascinating. (Maybe because it comes in the do-able doses of every 2/4 years). Anyway, I am learning a few things through the olympics this year, and I thought I'd share my pearls of wisdom. 1. Be discerning in which events you allow your children to watch if they tend to do things like this. I had a brief moment of panic as my sons watched the skiers who seem to fly off of the ramp. Visions of how they were going to re-create this flashed through my mind, and I found myself saying things like, "but we don't do this off of the steps, right?" "We need to remember that these men have spent years training...in the snow... on a mountain...etc." 2. My husband is an amazing sports efficianato. Now, I am used to hearing my husband say things while watching football, that the commentators repeat verbatim. I was impressed with the fact that he noticed so much detail, and could beat them to the punch, so to speak. Imagine how surprised I was, though, to hear him looking at speed skating, downhill skiing, bobsledding, and hear him say things like, "oh man, he really slowed down on that last turn." I'm thinking to myself, "he looked like he was going pretty fast to me..." Then the commentator says, "he really slowed down on that last turn." Over and over Jason is making comments about triple lutz's and some thing called skeleton (?), and he is right every time. I don't understand, but I have a whole new respect for his uncanny knack at observing sports with such discernment. 3. Olympians are hard core, and I am a ninny. Some lady from some place won a gold on some type of skiing event while she was experiencing flu symptoms...including a fever and body aches. Other people ski with broken ribs. And every single athelete is there because he or she worked grueling hours in preparation and training. I was truly convicted when I considered how "soft" I am about pushing my body, or my brain to do anything difficult. This morning, after I had already started composing this post in my mind I found in my daily reading the following verse: 1 Cor. 9:25-27 25 Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. 26 So I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air. 27 But I discipline my body and keep it under control, [1] lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified. How kind of God to show me this verse when I have a visual image of the olympic atheletes in my mind. As I shared before, I often try to escape my life when it gets hard. Motherhood isn't a sprint, it is a long distance endurance race. I am weak and my stamina has been pitiful lately. But I have faith that God is going to help me to exercise self control, keep the imperishable prize ahead of me in view, and give me direction so that I'm not beating at the air. And to all of the other ladies out there running your endurance race, I'm cheering you on! Can you hear the great cloud of witnesses today as you tackle your own mountain...of laundry? Can you hear the applause as you gracefully execute your turn of the grocery cart with two or more kids in tow? Can you picture the gold of children whom you correct today for the twentieth time eventually running beside you, or even ahead of you, in the race? Go for the gold!!!

The Great Escape

2006-02-20T08:16:00.000-08:00

My mom tells a funny story about my sister when she was little. Karyn, prone to drama, was frustrated after being corrected by my mom and decided to run away. She headed out of the house on her tricycle with only the bare necessities...her baby sister (me, standing on the back), and my diapers. She headed off up a huge hill pedalling feverishly. It was a futile escape. She eventually went back home to where people loved her, cared for her, provided for her, and protected her. It dawned on me at some point in my life as wife, mother, and homemaker, that I too try to escape at times. Rather than pick up and leave, I do something more socially acceptable. In the past some of my great escapes were t.v., sleep, shopping. More recently God is showing me that the internet is my vacation of choice. I love getting online and checking blogs, reading the latest and the greatest. It gets me out of my world for a little while. None of my escapes in and of themselves are wrong. In fact, each one could be a means of grace. But I am convicted lately about hopping on my tricycle of blogworld, and e-mail and running away from the life God has called me to. God's will for me as a woman, is safe. If I try to avoid disciplining my kids, or doing quality homeschooling. If I let the laundry pile up, or play, "tag, you're it" when Jason comes home. If I know there is something I could be doing, but have decided to click from blog to blog instead - it is like running away on a tricycle. God is so gracious to remind me to "come home". Yes, I'm here bodily, but is my heart here? God help me to know when I am escaping life on the tricycle of an acceptable activity. Help me to obey you and return to the beautiful life you've called me to as a woman.

For Entertainment

2006-02-17T05:10:00.000-08:00

This was an impressive feat that took twenty minutes. Perhaps that is due to the fact that though they are twins, and the same height, Caleb outweighs Josh by ten pounds. Poor Josh kept getting smooshed by Caleb's weight.

Blog Merge

2006-02-17T05:05:00.000-08:00

I have decided to merge my two blogs together on Ordinary Mother. I originally started Quotable Kids just for me because I didn't want to forget all of the funny and sweet things my children say and do. My family and some close friends started checking it, however, and I thought it'd make life easier to just have one place to check rather than two. I am just going to use friday on Ordinary Mother to feature my kids. They are far more entertaining than I am that is for sure.

My Favorite Love Story

2006-02-14T07:36:00.000-08:00

Chapter One: My Single Dream Like any other young single woman, I had my "list" of characteristics for my future spouse. In slight departure from my girl-friends, my list had no requirements for physical appearance (he didn't have to be handsome), no requirements for personality (he didn't have to be funny), and no requirements for being romantic (he didn't have to bring me flowers or write poetry). In fact, there was only one major desire on this list: he had to be a pastor. In the invisible parenthesis after this "one" characteristic were that he must be a Sovereign Grace boy, he must want to church plant, and he must lead like my Dad. My mother asked me once if I cared whether or not he would actually cherish me. In my naivete I truly thought that this was unnecessary because the manly leader-type I was looking for would probably not be real mushy-gushy. You married ladies are probably laughing, and you single ladies are probably horrified. With the "musts" was one "must not". He must not be from Chesapeake. Now this needs a bit of explanation. First, there were no guys that seemed likely candidates for a spouse. The single men in our church were older...much older. The only one my age (and he was actually younger) was Jason Reyes, and he was out of the question (obviously more to come on this topic). Second, I wanted to go somewhere else. I had been in Maryland all my life, and sang wholeheartedly with Belle of Beauty and the Beast, "I want adventure in the great wide somewhere. I want it more than I can tell." I began to collect pictures and figurines of knights in shining armor, dreaming of being whisked away to somewhere other than here! Chapter Two: The death of a vision Somewhere during college I thought I found the guy who fit my list. When things didn't work out (he was not interested), I was devastated, not by him, but by death of a dream I had for being a pastor's wife. My mother walked me through this season of my life with much compassion and wisdom. After I graduated from college, I believed that I would either be married, or be a missionary somewhere. Instead, I was working at a Christian bookstore, and substitute teaching at a middle school. It was so confusing, and I remember many nights sitting on my bed with my mom just talking and crying and praying. I thought that if I honored God by not "dating" He would come through for me, and in my mind, He didn't. When I think back on my legalistic arrogance, thinking that my performance would result in God being obligated to bless me...I truly marvel at His mercy and patience. At the very core of my dreams for ministry, was not love for His glory, or even love for others...but love for my glory. We joined Sovereign Grace in 1985. I was fifteen, and from that point on the leaders of the movement had a movie-star like quality in my teenage mind. I glamorized the lives of the pastors and church planters. Seeing my Dad up close only convinced me more that I wanted to marry a pastor, like him. My mother was a compelling case for ministry as well. I wanted to do the hospitality like she did. I wanted women to look to me for wisdom and counsel, just like they did for her. It all seemed so wonderful because my parents have always loved ministry. Even when it was difficult, they never complained. So when I hit what felt like old maidhood a the ripe old age of twenty three, and there was nobody on the horizon, I was very depressed. I wish I could tell you that I reached a point where I became content with being single. I never did. By God's grace, I was able to serve in the local church in a variety of ways including leading a teenage girls' Bible study, playing keyboards on Sunday morning, and teaching at our church school. These things were very fulfilling, and I am so grateful for those unique years when I could really pour myself into the church. God also provided an accountability group that was very instrumental in helping me to be consistent in several of the spiritual disciplines. It was a season of growing in genuine love for the church. And slowly, I stopped dreaming of marrying a pastor. Whether that was a great spiritual accomplishment, or the work of my desire to be married, I can't say. All I know is that I eventually changed my list to be a man who loved God, loved the church, and could lead me. But whatever His means, God helped me to lay aside the ideal of marrying a pastor. Chapter three: The Boy Next Door Jason didn't literally live next door, but for a while he lived right down the street, and for years he lived in my neighborhood. We met when he was fifteen, and I was sixteen. A few "aw, isn't that sweet" things are that he still remembers what I was wearing the first time he saw me. He also kept ribbons that fell out of a hair comb I wore for my sister's wedding (we still hadn't really spoken to each other). I found them after we were married in a box with every letter I ever wrote to him. The short story about our early relationship is that we dated on and off for two years with much teenage drama. It was love or hate and nothing in between. Even though this was before anyone kissed dating goodbye, I still knew that the relationship was wrong, and had much guilt over it. We finally broke up for good, with the help of my parents, and I committed to not enter another dating relationship until marriage was an option. It took me years to get over Jason. Without going into unnecessary detail (why change now, Laurie, you're asking), Jason at one point, a couple years after our last break up asked me if I ever thought someday in the future I could see us being married. An odd question that had something to do with the fact that my attention had recently, after years, turned to another guy. But still, a shocking question, to which I answered, "God told me you were not the one." He was very upset. He always thought we would get married (I never knew he thought this). When I went inside, I cried and cried. After I told my mother about it she said, "Laurie, you don't know if God told you that or not. Why would you say it that way?" I was shocked. I thought my parents would be with me on the "no more Jason" bandwagon. But they were with me on the "no more men until it's the right time" bandwagon. Well, that conversation helped Jason to be completely free from me emotionally. Soon after he went to Knoxville. Chapter Four: Birth of a Vision You gals in Knoxville, if you've hung in here that long, were part of a crucial element in the story. In Knoxville, Jason joined Cornerstone Church, and began serving there in a way that he hadn't at Chesapeake. He really grew spiritually in this new environment and was thriving with godly friends, and regular meetings with one of the pastors. Once in a while Jason would call me from Tennessee and we would have great conversations. It was the only time we functioned as "just friends". I will say, however, that I was never indifferent enough to feel no pang of jealousy when he mentioned a girl he was interested in. Still, it was as neutral as we ever have been toward each other, and very strange to not love or hate as our custom was in the past. When Jason came home, I noticed his love for the church had grown. He served at Chesapeake with the youth (along with my dad and brother, Jimmy). He played drums on our worship team. But still, he was eager to get back to Knoxville. God had different plans. His money ran out, and he had to spend a year working as a car salesman here in Maryland. God used this season in many ways in Jason's life, but that's a different story. During the year Jason was working to save money for UT, I became close friends with his sister Emily. I spent much time at the Reyes house with her. It's funny to think back on how Jason would barely acknowledge me at his house. His parents were great. In fact, for all of the years Jason and I knew each other, his mother held to the conviction that I was going to be his wife. She never wavered in this...she's the only one who never wavered. Chapter Five: The Invisible Hand of Providence Jason was all set to go back to Knoxville when at the last minute, God intervened and his loan fell through. Miraculously, Towson University accepted his very late application to the education department. He was disappointed, but couldn't deny God's hand in the whole thing. Unbeknownst to me, my dad had been praying that God would bring my husband around before the end of the year. Jason's mom was praying that God would change our hearts toward each other. The Reyes' were coming over for Thanksgiving in 1994. (This was seven years after Jason and I first met.) All I remember is that Jason, Jimmy, Emily and I were playing cards and Jason was flirting with me. I kept thinking, "hey...It's me...Laurie...what are you doing?" Still, I liked it. Something in my heart started to change towards this guy that I thought God told me I would never marry. No, he wasn't a pastor, but he loved the Lord, he loved the church, and he was a leader. Besides, I knew him. I knew everything about him :good, bad, ugly. I watched him grow up right next to me, and rather than a prince sweeping me off of my feet to a far away land, I found comfort and charm in being with my old friend, the boy next door. In December, just in time to honor my dad's prayer, Jason took a huge risk and asked me if I would enter into courtship (I don't think we called it that) with him. He said he was nervous because of what I said years before, but took the risk anyway. His side of the story was that since that September when God closed the doors to go to back to Knoxville, God opened his eyes to see what was here in Maryland. It was like God put on a pair of glasses, and he could see qualities in me that he wanted in a wife. I wasn't the southern belle he was hoping for (I am the quintessential northeast girl), but ironically, I was born in Kentucky. Good enough. Chapter Six: Dream Come True From that first discussion about our relationship, we knew we would marry one another. On Valentines Day, just two months later, Jason proposed to me. We were married in August of '95. It all felt so normal, and almost matter of fact. It wasn't the whirlwind, or fireworks, or drama that I expected. But something about it was sweeter, and even more romantic in hindsight. Now, if you have hung in here this long and you're still reading, you are thinking, "Hey, you got what you wanted. You are a pastor's wife." When I married Jason, he was going to be an elementary school teacher. Now granted, he chose this major so that if he ever wanted to be on a church planting team, he could find work anywhere. Still, neither of us thought he would be a pastor. Jason finished his last year of school during the first year of marriage. I remember the time came for him to make a huge decision to either take one of three teaching positions offered to him, or work at the church school at Chesapeake. The church job didn't pay well, but we had a special government home-loan that adjusted to our income level, so it was possible to live on the low salary. He prayed, sought counsel, prayed more, and decided to work for the church as a middle school teacher. We were helping the pastor over the youth at the time as well. Over the course of a few years it became evident to the pastors that Jason had a call on his life for pastoral ministry. He began to oversee the youth ministry, and continue teaching in the school. Then through a series of events, needs arose that eventually led to his being the pastor of married life ministry (now called "adult life"). He was ordained in 2002, and continues to grow as a pastor under my dad's leadership. Truly the testimony of our marriage has been that God has given me what I did not deserve. He has given me more than I thought to dream of. Yes my husband is a pastor, and there is significant blessing in our lives because of this. But one thing I didn't think to hope for was being cherished. I am the most spoiled wife I know. There isn't a moment when I don't feel absolutely loved and cherished by this man. He is a joy to serve. He is easy to follow. Now, rather than dreaming of being a pastor's wife, I'm pursuing what other women, regardless of their husband's profession pursue, being a Proverbs 31 woman, and a Titus 2 lady. I want to be worthy of this man. Even more, I want to walk in a manner that's worthy of the gospel. Many times when we are sitting in bed at night, reading or talking, I will say, "Can you believe we married each other...and we have four kids in the other rooms sleeping?!" I look at my handsome man (who truly gets better looking with age) and think, "I am married to my dream man!"

One Man's Hill Is Another Man's Mountain

2006-02-12T09:58:00.000-08:00

The boys spent two hours sledding down the front yard...their own little olympic event!

My Snow Angel

2006-02-12T09:32:00.000-08:00

It was actually too deep for Maggie to make a good snow angel.